thoughtof
her
!
he
had
noticed
her
absence
!
"
I
can
assure
you
that
nothing
save
indisposition
could
have
induced
me
to
remain
away
from
a
place
where
one
gathers
so
much
matter
for
useful
and
serious
meditation
,
"
answered
the
lady
.
"
And
yet
the
world
generally
forgets
the
doctrines
which
are
enunciated
from
the
pulpit
,
an
hour
after
their
delivery
,
"
observed
Reginald
.
"
Yes
—
when
they
are
doled
forth
by
ministers
who
have
neither
talent
nor
eloquence
to
make
a
profound
impression
,
"
said
Cecilia
,
artfully
conveying
a
compliment
without
appearing
to
mean
one
at
the
moment
.
"
I
believe
that
our
churches
would
be
much
better
frequented
,
were
the
clergy
less
dogmatic
,
less
obscure
;
and
did
they
address
themselves
more
to
the
hearts
of
their
hearers
than
they
do
.
"
"
I
believe
it
is
necessary
to
appeal
to
the
heart
,
and
not
be
satisfied
with
merely
reaching
the
ears
,
"
said
the
rector
,
modestly
.
"
And
wherever
the
pastor
possesses
the
rare
talent
of
moving
the
feeling
,
—
of
exciting
the
mind
to
salutary
reflection
,
as
well
as
merely
expounding
points
of
doctrine
,
—
thither
will
the
multitude
flock
,
high
and
low
,
rich
and
poor
.
Oh
!
"
exclaimed
Cecilia
,
as
if
carried
away
by
the
enthusiasm
of
the
subject
,
"
how
grand
—
how
noble
a
situation
does
that
man
occupy
,
who
,
by
the
magic
of
his
voice
and
the
power
of
his
mind
,
can
collect
the
thousands
around
his
pulpit
!
I
can
understand
how
an
impression
may
be
easily
made
upon
the
half-educated
or
totally
ignorant
classes
of
society
:
but
to
cast
a
spell
upon
the
intelligent
,
the
well-informed
,
and
the
erudite
,
—
to
congregate
the
aristocracy
of
the
realm
to
listen
to
the
words
that
flow
from
his
mouth
,
—
oh
!
great
,
indeed
,
must
be
the
influence
of
such
a
man
!
"
"
You
consider
,
then
,
Lady
Cecilia
,
that
the
upper
classes
need
powerful
inducements
to
attend
to
the
truths
of
religion
?
"
said
Reginald
,
irresistibly
charmed
by
the
witching
eloquence
that
had
marked
the
language
of
the
beautiful
woman
in
whose
society
he
found
himself
.
"
I
consider
—
but
,
if
I
tell
you
my
thoughts
,
"
said
Cecilia
,
suddenly
checking
herself
,
"
I
shall
unavoidably
pay
a
high
compliment
to
you
;
and
that
neither
—
—
"
"
Let
me
hear
your
ladyship
's
sentiments
in
any
case
,
"
said
the
clergyman
,
fearful
of
losing
those
honied
words
which
produced
upon
him
an
impression
such
as
he
had
never
experienced
in
his
life
before
.
"
I
believe
,
"
continued
Cecilia
,
"
that
the
upper
classes
in
this
country
are
very
irreligious
.
I
do
not
say
that
they
are
infidels
:
no
—
they
all
cherish
a
profound
conviction
of
the
truths
of
the
gospel
.
But
their
mode
of
life
—
their
indolent
and
luxurious
habits
,
militate
against
a
due
regard
to
religious
ceremonials
.
How
is
it
,
then
,
that
they
are
aroused
from
their
apathy
?
They
hear
of
some
great
preacher
,
and
curiosity
in
the
first
instance
prompts
them
to
visit
the
place
of
his
ministry
.
They
go
—
almost
as
they
would
repair
to
see
a
new
play
.
But
when
they
listen
to
his
words
—
when
they
drink
,
in
spite
of
themselves
,
large
draughts
of
the
fervour
which
animates
him
—
when
he
appeals
to
their
hearts
,
then
they
begin
to
perceive
that
there
is
something
more
in
religion
than
an
observance
of
a
cold
ceremonial
;
and
they
go
home
'
to
reflect
!
'
"
"
You
believe
that
to
be
the
case
?
"
said
the
rector
,
delighted
at
this
description
of
an
influence
and
an
effect
which
he
could
not
do
otherwise
than
know
to
be
associated
with
his
own
ministry
.
"
I
feel
convinced
that
such
is
the
fact
,
"
answered
Lady
Cecilia
;
then
,
lowering
her
tone
in
a
mysterious
manner
,
and
leaning
towards
him
,
she
added
,
"
Many
of
my
friends
have
confessed
that
such
has
been
the
case
in
respect
to
their
attendance
at
your
chapel
—
and
such
was
the
case
with
myself
!
"
"
With
you
,
Lady
Cecilia
?
"
exclaimed
the
clergyman
,
vainly
endeavouring
to
conceal
the
triumph
which
he
experienced
at
this
announcement
.
"
Yes
,
with
me
,
"
continued
the
artful
woman
.
"
For
,
to
be
candid
with
you
,
Mr.
Tracy
,
I
need
consolation
of
some
kind
—
and
the
solace
of
religion
is
the
most
natural
and
the
most
effective
.
My
domestic
life
,
"
she
proceeded
,
in
a
deeply
pathetic
tone
,
"
is
far
from
a
happy
one
.
Sir
Rupert
thinks
more
of
his
own
pleasures
than
of
his
wife
;
—
he
does
more
than
neglect
me
—
he
abandons
me
for
weeks
and
weeks
together
.
"
She
put
her
handkerchief
to
her
eyes
.
Mr.
Tracy
drew
his
chair
closer
to
the
sofa
on
which
she
was
seated
:
it
was
only
a
mechanical
movement
on
his
part
—
the
movement
of
one
who
draws
nearer
as
the
conversation
becomes
more
confidential
.
"
But
why
should
I
intrude
my
sorrows
upon
you
?
"
suddenly
exclaimed
Cecilia
.
"
And
yet
if
it
be
not
to
the
minister
of
religion
to
whom
we
poor
creatures
must
unburden
our
woes
,
where
else
can
we
seek
for
consolation
?
from
what
other
source
can
we
hope
to
receive
lessons
of
resignation
and
patience
?
"
"
True
,
"
said
the
rector
.
"
And
that
has
often
appeared
to
me
the
best
and
redeeming
feature
in
the
Roman
Catholic
world
,
where
the
individual
places
reliance
upon
his
priest
,
and
looks
to
him
for
spiritual
support
and
aid
.
"
"
Ah
!
would
that
our
creed
permitted
us
the
same
privilege
!
"
said
Lady
Cecilia
,
with
great
apparent
enthusiasm
.
"
I
know
of
no
rule
nor
law
which
forbids
the
exercise
of
such
a
privilege
,
"
said
Reginald
;
"
unless
,
indeed
,
usage
and
custom
be
predominant
,
and
will
admit
of
no
exceptions
.
"
"
For
my
part
,
I
despise
such
customs
and
usages
,
when
they
tend
to
the
exclusion
of
those
delightful
outpourings
of
confidence
which
the
individual
pants
to
breathe
into
the
ears
of
the
pastor
in
whom
implicit
faith
can
be
placed
.
In
how
many
cases
could
the
good
clergyman
advise
his
parishioners
,
to
the
maintenance
of
their
domestic
comfort
?
how
many
heart-burnings
in
families
would
not
such
a
minister
be
enabled
to
soothe
?
Oh
!
sir
,
I
feel
that
your
eloquence
could
teach
me
how
to
bear
,
unrepiningly
,
and
even
cheerfully
,
all
the
sorrows
of
my
own
domestic
hearth
!
"
"
Then
look
upon
me
as
a
friend
,
my
dear
Lady
Cecilia
,
"
said
the
clergyman
,
drawing
his
chair
a
little
closer
still
:
"
look
upon
me
as
a
friend
;
and
happy
indeed
shall
I
be
if
my
humble
agency
or
advice
can
contribute
to
smooth
the
path
of
life
for
even
only
one
individual
!
"
"
Mr.
Tracy
,
I
accept
your
preferred
friendship
—
I
accept
it
as
sincerely
as
it
is
offered
,
"
exclaimed
Lady
Cecilia
;
and
she
extended
her
hand
towards
him
.
He
took
it
.
It
was
soft
and
warm
,
and
it
gently
pressed
his
.
He
returned
the
pressure
:
—
was
it
not
the
token
,
the
pledge
of
friendship
?
He
thought
so
—
and
he
meant
no
harm
.
But
again
did
the
contact
of
that
soft
and
warm
hand
awake
within
his
breast
a
flame
till
then
unknown
;
and
his
cheeks
flushed
,
and
his
eyes
met
those
of
the
fair
—
the
fascinating
creature
,
who
craved
his
friendship
!
"
Henceforth
,
"
said
Cecilia
,
who
now
saw
that
her
intrigue
was
progressing
towards
a
complete
triumph
—
even
more
rapidly
than
she
had
ever
anticipated
—
"
henceforth
you
will
have
no
votary
more
constant
in
attendance
than
I
;
but
,
on
your
part
,
you
must
occasionally
spare
from
your
valuable
time
a
single
half
hour
wherein
to
impart
to
me
the
consolations
I
so
much
require
.
"
"
Be
not
afraid
,
Lady
Cecilia
,
"
said
the
rector
,
who
now
felt
himself
attracted
towards
that
woman
by
a
spell
of
irresistible
influence
:
"
I
shall
not
forget
that
you
have
ingenuously
and
frankly
sought
my
spiritual
aid
;
and
I
should
be
false
to
the
holy
cause
in
which
I
have
embarked
,
were
I
to
withhold
it
.
"
"
I
thank
you
—
deeply
,
sincerely
thank
you
,
"
exclaimed
Cecilia
.
"
But
judge
for
yourself
whether
I
do
not
seek
solace
,
in
my
domestic
afflictions
,
from
the
proper
source
!
This
is
the
book
which
I
was
reading
when
you
called
.
"
Cecilia
took
up
Sturm
's
"
Reflections
,
"
and
opened
the
book
at
random
.
"
There
,
"
she
said
;
"
it
was
this
page
which
I
was
perusing
.
"
She
held
the
book
in
her
hands
as
she
reclined
,
rather
than
sate
,
upon
the
sofa
;
and
the
clergyman
was
compelled
to
lean
over
her
to
obtain
a
glimpse
of
the
page
to
which
she
pointed
.
His
hair
touched
hers
:
she
did
not
move
her
head
.
Their
faces
were
close
to
each
other
.
But
not
an
impure
thought
entered
his
soul
:
still
he
was
again
excited
by
that
thrilling
sensation
which
came
over
him
whenever
he
touched
her
.
She
affected
not
to
perceive
that
their
hair
commingled
,
but
pointed
to
the
page
,
and
expatiated
upon
its
contents
.
In
a
moment
of
abstraction
,
for
which
he
could
not
account
,
and
against
the
influence
of
which
he
was
not
proof
,
Reginald
Tracy
's
eyes
wandered
from
the
book
to
the
form
which
reclined
,
beneath
his
glance
,
as
it
were
,
upon
the
sofa
.
That
glance
swept
the
well-proportioned
undulations
of
the
slight
but
charming
figure
which
was
voluptuously
stretched
upon
the
cushions
.
Suddenly
Cecilia
left
off
speaking
,
and
turned
her
eyes
upward
to
his
countenance
.
Their
glances
met
;
and
Reginald
did
not
immediately
avert
his
head
.
There
was
something
in
the
depths
of
those
melting
blue
orbs
which
fascinated
him
.
Still
he
suspected
not
his
extreme
danger
;
and
when
he
rose
to
depart
,
it
was
simply
because
he
felt
like
a
man
flushed
with
wine
,
and
who
requires
air
.
He
took
his
leave
;
and
Cecilia
reminded
him
that
she
should
expect
to
see
him
soon
again
.
Can
there
be
a
doubt
as
to
his
answer
?
When
he
regarded
his
watch
,
on
reaching
the
street
,
he
was
astounded
to
perceive
that
two
hours
had
slipped
away
since
he
entered
the
house
.
And
a
deep
flush
suddenly
overspread
his
countenance
as
he
beheld
the
viper-like
eyes
of
a
hideous
old
hag
,
who
was
standing
near
the
steps
of
the
front-door
,
fixed
upon
him
with
a
leer
which
for
an
instant
struck
a
chill
to
his
heart
by
its
ominous
and
yet
dim
significancy
.
CHAPTER
CXXVIII
.
TEMPTATION
.
"
He
will
come
again
on
Wednesday
,
"
said
Lady
Cecilia
to
herself
,
as
she
heard
the
front
door
close
behind
the
Rev.
Reginald
Tracy
.
This
wily
woman
was
well-acquainted
with
the
human
heart
:
she
had
discovered
the
weak
side
of
the
rector
of
Saint
David
's
:
she
assailed
him
by
means
of
his
vulnerable
point
;
she
directed
her
way
to
his
heart
through
the
avenue
of
his
vanity
.
Yes
—
Reginald
Tracy
was
vain
,
—
as
vain
as
a
man
who
was
admired
and
sought
after
by
all
classes
,
was
likely
to
be
rendered
,
—
as
vain
as
a
spoiled
child
of
the
public
could
be
.
His
life
had
,
moreover
,
been
so
pure
,
so
chaste
,
so
ascetic
,
that
the
fierce
passions
which
agitate
other
men
were
unknown
to
him
;
and
,
as
all
mortals
must
be
characterised
by
some
failing
,
his
was
a
habit
of
self-admiration
!
Venial
and
insignificant
was
this
foible
,
so
long
as
no
advantage
was
taken
of
it
by
designing
or
worldly-minded
persons
;
but
even
our
lightest
defects
,
as
well
as
our
most
"
pleasant
vices
,
"
may
be
made
the
means
of
our
ruin
.
Vanity
is
a
noxious
weed
which
,
when
nurtured
by
the
dews
of
flattery
,
spreads
its
poisonous
roots
throughout
the
fertile
soil
of
the
heart
;
and
each
root
springs
up
into
a
plant
more
venomous
,
more
rank
;
more
baleful
than
its
predecessor
.
The
life
of
Reginald
Tracy
had
been
singularly
pure
.
He
had
even
passed
through
the
ordeal
of
a
college
career
without
affixing
the
least
stain
on
the
chastity
of
his
soul
.
Yet
with
all
his
austerity
of
virtue
,
he
was
characterised
by
no
austerity
of
manner
:
he
mixed
freely
in
society
,
and
hesitated
not
to
frequent
the
ball-room
—
although
he
did
not
dance
.
He
could
be
a
pleasant
companion
:
at
the
same
time
he
never
uttered
a
word
upon
which
he
had
to
retrospect
with
regret
.
When
amongst
men
,
no
obscene
jest
nor
ribald
allusion
was
vented
in
his
presence
;
and
yet
he
was
never
voted
"
a
bore
.
"
In
a
word
,
he
was
one
of
those
men
who
possess
the
rare
talent
of
maintaining
a
character
for
every
virtue
,
and
of
being
held
up
as
a
pattern
and
an
example
,
without
creating
a
single
enemy
—
without
even
being
compelled
to
encounter
the
irony
of
the
libertine
,
and
without
producing
a
feeling
of
restraint
or
embarrassment
in
the
society
which
he
frequented
.
Such
was
Reginald
Tracy
;
and
it
was
this
man
,
—
who
at
the
age
of
thirty-six
could
look
back
with
complacency
upon
a
spotless
life
,
—
a
life
unsullied
by
a
single
fault
,
—
an
existence
devoid
of
the
slightest
dereliction
from
moral
propriety
,
—
it
was
this
good
,
this
holy
,
this
saint-like
man
whom
the
daring
Cecilia
undertook
to
subdue
.
Reginald
,
Reginald
!
the
day
of
thy
temptation
has
now
come
:
thou
standest
upon
a
pinnacle
of
the
temple
—
the
tempter
is
by
thy
side
;
—
take
good
heed
of
thyself
,
Reginald
Tracy
!
"
He
will
come
again
on
Wednesday
,
"
had
said
Lady
Cecilia
.
The
prediction
was
fulfilled
!
The
morning
had
been
so
inclement
that
no
one
would
have
stirred
abroad
unless
actuated
by
important
motives
.
The
rain
had
fallen
in
torrents
,
—
beating
violently
against
the
windows
,
and
inundating
the
streets
.
It
had
,
however
,
ceased
at
noon
;
but
the
sky
remained
covered
with
black
clouds
;
and
at
three
o'clock
on
that
gloomy
winter-day
it
was
dark
and
sombre
as
if
night
were
at
hand
.
But
in
spite
of
that
inauspicious
weather
,
the
Rev.
Reginald
Tracy
knocked
at
Lady
Cecilia
Harborough
's
door
at
the
hour
which
we
have
just
mentioned
.
The
designing
creature
received
the
clergyman
with
a
smile
,
exclaiming
at
the
same
time
,
"
It
is
indeed
kind
of
you
to
visit
me
on
such
a
day
as
this
.
I
have
been
so
happy
—
so
resigned
—
so
possessed
with
the
most
complete
mental
tranquillity
since
you
manifested
sympathy
and
interest
in
my
behalf
,
that
your
presence
appears
to
be
that
of
a
good
angel
!
"
"
It
is
our
duty
to
sustain
those
who
droop
,
and
console
those
who
suffer
,
"
answered
the
rector
.
"
Delightful
task
!
"
ejaculated
Cecilia
.
"
What
a
pure
and
holy
satisfaction
must
you
enjoy
,
when
you
reflect
upon
the
amount
of
comfort
which
your
lessons
impart
to
the
world-wearied
and
sinking
spirit
.
Believe
me
,
many
an
one
has
entered
the
gates
of
your
chapel
with
a
weight
upon
his
soul
almost
too
heavy
for
him
to
bear
,
and
has
issued
forth
carrying
his
burden
of
care
lightly
,
if
not
cheerfully
,
along
!
"
"
Do
you
really
imagine
that
my
humble
agency
can
produce
such
good
results
in
the
cause
of
heaven
?
"
asked
Reginald
,
fixing
a
glance
of
mingled
tenderness
and
satisfaction
upon
the
charming
countenance
of
Cecilia
.
"
I
do
—
I
do
,
"
she
answered
,
with
apparent
enthusiasm
;
"
I
can
judge
by
the
effect
which
your
admirable
discourse
of
last
Sunday
morning
produced
upon
myself
.
For
—
let
me
not
deceive
you
,
"
she
continued
,
hanging
down
her
head
,
and
speaking
in
a
tremulous
and
tender
voice
,
—
"
let
me
not
deceive
you
—
it
was
not
the
heat
of
the
chapel
which
overcame
me
—
it
was
your
eloquence
!
I
dared
not
confess
this
to
you
at
first
;
but
now
—
now
that
I
can
look
upon
you
as
a
friend
—
I
need
have
no
secret
from
you
.
"
She
took
his
hand
as
she
uttered
these
words
,
and
pressed
it
in
a
manner
which
he
conceived
to
be
indicative
of
grateful
fervour
;
and
without
a
thought
of
evil
—
but
with
an
undefinable
sensation
of
pleasure
to
which
until
lately
he
had
been
all
his
life
a
stranger
—
he
returned
that
pressure
.
Lady
Cecilia
did
not
withdraw
her
hand
,
but
allowed
it
to
linger
in
his
;
and
he
retained
it
under
the
influence
of
that
sensation
which
caused
his
veins
to
flow
with
liquid
fire
.
He
was
sitting
on
the
sofa
by
her
side
,
and
his
eyes
wandered
from
her
countenance
over
the
outlines
of
her
form
.
"
Oh
!
how
can
the
man
who
accompanied
you
to
the
altar
,
and
there
swore
to
love
and
cherish
you
,
"
he
exclaimed
,
in
an
ebullition
of
impassioned
feelings
such
as
he
had
never
known
before
,
—
"
how
can
that
man
find
it
in
his
heart
to
neglect
—
to
abandon
you
,
—
you
who
are
evidently
all
gentleness
,
amiability
,
and
candour
!
"
"
He
has
no
heart
—
no
soul
for
any
one
save
himself
,
"
answered
Cecilia
.
"
And
now
tell
me
—
relieve
my
mind
from
a
most
painful
suspense
upon
one
point
!
Am
I
criminal
in
the
eyes
of
heaven
,
because
I
have
ceased
to
love
one
whom
I
vowed
to
love
,
but
whose
conduct
has
quenched
all
the
affection
that
I
once
experienced
for
him
?
"
"
You
must
not
harden
your
heart
against
him
,
"
said
Reginald
;
"
but
by
your
resignation
,
your
uncomplaining
patience
,
your
meekness
,
and
your
constant
devotion
to
his
interests
,
you
must
seek
to
bring
him
back
to
the
paths
of
duty
and
love
.
"
"
I
might
as
well
essay
to
teach
the
hyena
gratitude
,
"
answered
Cecilia
.
"
You
speak
too
bitterly
,
"
rejoined
the
rector
of
Saint
David
's
;
and
yet
he
was
not
altogether
displeased
at
the
aversion
which
Lady
Cecilia
's
language
manifested
towards
her
husband
.
"
Alas
!
we
have
no
power
over
volition
,
"
said
she
;
"
and
that
doctrine
is
a
severe
one
which
enjoins
us
to
kiss
the
hand
that
strikes
us
.
"
"
True
,
"
observed
Reginald
.
"
I
know
not
how
it
is
—
but
I
feel
that
I
am
at
this
moment
unaccountably
deficient
in
argument
to
meet
your
objections
;
and
yet
—
—
"
He
paused
,
for
he
felt
embarrassed
;
but
he
knew
not
why
.
"
Oh
!
you
can
appreciate
the
difficulty
of
enjoining
a
love
towards
one
who
merits
hatred
,
"
exclaimed
Cecilia
,
now
skilfully
availing
herself
of
the
crisis
to
which
she
had
so
artfully
conducted
the
conversation
.
"
You
see
that
you
are
deficient
in
reasoning
to
enforce
the
alleged
necessity
of
maintaining
,
cherishing
,
and
nourishing
respect
and
veneration
for
a
husband
who
has
forfeited
all
claims
to
such
feelings
on
the
part
of
his
injured
wife
.
At
all
events
,
do
not
tell
me
that
I
am
criminal
in
ceasing
to
love
one
who
oppresses
me
;
—
do
not
say
that
I
offend
heaven
by
ceasing
to
kiss
the
hand
that
rudely
repulses
all
my
overtures
of
affection
;
—
oh
!
tell
me
not
that
—
or
you
will
make
me
very
,
very
miserable
indeed
!
"
Lady
Cecilia
's
bosom
was
convulsed
with
sobs
as
she
uttered
these
words
in
a
rapid
and
impassioned
manner
;
and
as
she
ceased
speaking
her
head
fell
upon
Reginald
's
shoulder
.
"
Compose
yourself
—
compose
yourself
,
Lady
Cecilia
,
"
exclaimed
the
clergyman
,
alarmed
by
this
ebullition
of
grief
,
the
sincerity
of
which
he
could
not
for
one
moment
suspect
.
"
Do
not
give
way
to
sorrow
—
remember
the
lessons
of
resignation
and
patience
which
you
have
heard
from
my
lips
—
remember
—
—
"
But
the
lady
sobbed
as
if
her
heart
would
break
:
her
head
reclined
upon
his
shoulder
—
her
forehead
touched
his
face
—
her
hand
was
still
clasped
in
his
.
"
Oh
Reginald
!
—
Reginald
!
"
she
murmured
,
"
I
cannot
love
my
husband
more
—
no
—
it
is
impossible
!
I
love
another
!
"
"
You
love
another
!
"
ejaculated
the
rector
,
his
whole
frame
trembling
with
an
ineffable
feeling
of
mingled
joy
and
suspense
.
"
Yes
—
and
now
reproach
,
revile
me
—
leave
me
—
spurn
me
—
treat
me
with
contempt
!
"
continued
Cecilia
:
"
do
all
this
if
you
will
;
but
never
,
never
can
you
prevent
me
from
idolizing
—
adoring
you
!
"
"
Cecilia
!
"
cried
Reginald
Tracy
,
starting
from
his
seat
;
"
you
know
not
what
you
are
saying
!
"
"
Alas
!
I
know
but
too
well
the
feelings
which
my
words
express
,
"
returned
the
lady
,
clasping
her
hands
together
,
and
sobbing
violently
.
"
Hear
me
for
a
few
minutes
,
and
then
leave
me
to
the
misery
of
my
fate
—
a
hopeless
love
,
and
a
breaking
heart
!
"
"
Speak
,
then
,
and
unburden
your
mind
to
me
without
reserve
,
"
said
Reginald
,
resuming
his
seat
upon
the
sofa
,
and
inviting
a
confidence
the
thought
of
which
produced
in
his
mind
emotions
of
bliss
and
burning
joy
,
the
power
of
which
was
irresistible
.
"
Yes
,
I
will
speak
,
even
though
I
render
myself
contemptible
in
your
sight
,
"
continued
Cecilia
,
wiping
her
eyes
and
affecting
to
resume
that
calmness
which
she
had
never
lost
more
than
the
impassioned
actress
on
the
stage
,
when
enacting
some
melo-dramatic
part
.
"
For
months
and
months
past
I
have
cherished
for
you
a
feeling
,
the
true
nature
of
which
has
only
revealed
itself
to
me
within
the
last
few
days
.
In
the
first
instance
,
I
admired
your
character
and
your
talents
:
I
respected
you
;
and
respect
and
admiration
soon
ripened
into
another
feeling
.
You
do
not
know
the
heart
of
woman
;
but
it
is
ever
moved
by
a
contemplation
of
the
sublime
characteristics
of
remarkable
men
—
like
you
.
I
met
you
in
society
,
and
I
almost
worshipped
the
ground
on
which
you
trod
.
I
listened
to
your
conversation
:
not
a
word
was
lost
to
me
!
During
long
and
sleepless
nights
your
image
was
ever
present
to
my
mind
.
You
became
an
idol
that
I
adored
.
At
length
you
yourself
,
one
evening
,
innocently
and
unconsciously
,
fanned
the
flame
that
was
engendered
in
my
heart
:
you
told
me
that
I
looked
well
.
That
passing
compliment
rendered
me
your
devoted
slave
.
I
thought
that
no
human
happiness
could
be
greater
than
that
of
pleasing
you
.
I
resolved
to
attend
your
chapel
from
that
period
.
I
obtained
the
pew
that
was
nearest
to
the
pulpit
;
and
when
you
preached
I
was
electrified
.
Oh
!
you
saw
how
I
was
overcome
!
Your
attention
to
me
on
that
occasion
threw
additional
chains
around
me
.
Then
you
called
on
me
the
day
before
yesterday
,
and
you
spoke
so
kindly
that
I
was
every
moment
on
the
point
of
falling
at
your
feet
,
and
exclaiming
,
—
'
Forgive
me
,
but
I
now
know
that
I
love
you
!
'
You
proffered
me
your
friendship
:
how
joyously
I
accepted
the
sacred
gift
!
And
that
friendship
—
oh
!
let
me
not
forfeit
it
now
—
for
the
love
which
my
heart
cherishes
for
you
shall
be
as
pure
and
taintless
as
that
friendship
with
which
you
have
blessed
me
!
"
Reginald
had
listened
to
this
strange
confession
with
the
most
profound
attention
;
—
yes
,
and
with
the
deepest
interest
.
A
young
and
beautiful
woman
had
avowed
her
love
for
him
—
she
sate
near
him
;
—
his
hand
still
thrilled
with
the
pressure
of
hers
—
his
cheek
was
still
warm
and
flushed
with
the
contact
of
her
white
and
polished
forehead
;
—
the
room
was
involved
in
obscurity
and
silence
.
She
had
insinuated
herself
,
in
an
incredibly
short
space
of
time
,
into
his
heart
,
by
flattering
his
vanity
and
exciting
those
desires
which
had
hitherto
slumbered
so
profoundly
in
his
breast
,
but
which
were
now
ready
to
burst
for
with
the
violence
of
the
long
pent-up
volcano
.
He
trembled
—
he
hesitated
.
At
one
moment
he
was
inclined
to
rush
from
the
house
,
as
if
from
the
presence
of
the
tempter
;
and
then
he
remembered
that
the
love
which
she
had
avowed
was
as
pure
as
his
friendship
!
Nevertheless
,
the
struggle
in
his
mind
was
terrific
.
Cecilia
understood
it
all
.
"
You
hate
me
—
you
despise
me
,
"
she
suddenly
exclaimed
,
covering
her
face
with
her
hands
.
"
Oh
!
do
not
crush
me
with
your
contempt
—
do
not
abandon
me
to
the
conviction
of
your
abhorrence
!
Reginald
—
take
pity
upon
me
:
forgive
me
for
loving
you
—
forgive
me
—
on
my
knees
I
implore
you
!
"
She
threw
herself
before
him
:
she
took
his
hand
and
pressed
it
to
her
lips
.
She
covered
it
with
kisses
.
"
Cecilia
,
"
murmured
the
rector
,
making
a
faint
effort
to
withdraw
his
hand
.
"
No
—
no
,
you
shall
not
leave
me
thus
,
"
she
exclaimed
,
with
apparent
wildness
:
"
I
should
die
if
you
went
away
,
without
telling
me
that
you
forgive
me
!
No
,
you
must
not
leave
me
thus
!
"
"
Rise
,
Cecilia
—
rise
—
in
the
name
of
heaven
,
rise
!
"
exclaimed
Reginald
,
alarmed
lest
they
should
be
discovered
in
that
equivocal
position
:
"
rise
,
and
I
will
forgive
you
.
I
will
do
all
that
you
desire
—
I
will
not
leave
you
until
you
are
composed
.
"
"
And
you
will
return
and
see
me
again
?
you
will
not
withdraw
your
friendship
?
"
demanded
Cecilia
,
in
a
soft
and
melting
tone
.
"
No
—
never
,
never
!
"
cried
Reginald
,
enthusiastically
,
as
if
he
suddenly
abandoned
himself
to
the
torrent
of
passion
which
now
swept
through
his
soul
.
"
Oh
!
thank
you
—
thank
you
for
that
assurance
!
"
exclaimed
Cecilia
;
and
,
as
if
yielding
to
an
unconquerable
burst
of
feeling
,
she
threw
herself
into
his
arms
:
"
you
shall
be
as
a
brother
to
me
;
and
our
friendship
,
our
love
,
shall
be
eternal
!
"
Her
rich
red
mouth
was
pressed
upon
the
rector
's
lips
;
her
arms
were
wound
around
him
;
and
for
a
moment
he
yielded
to
the
intoxicating
delight
of
that
pleasure
so
new
to
him
.
But
ere
he
was
entirely
culpable
,
his
guardian
genius
struck
his
soul
with
a
sudden
remorse
;
and
,
disengaging
himself
from
the
syren
's
arms
,
he
imprinted
one
long
—
burning
—
delicious
kiss
upon
her
lips
;
then
,
murmuring
,
"
To-morrow
,
to-morrow
,
dearest
Cecilia
,
I
will
see
thee
again
,
"
rushed
from
the
room
.
"
He
is
mine
!
"
exclaimed
the
lady
,
as
the
door
closed
behind
him
;
"
irrevocably
mine
!
"
CHAPTER
CXXIX
.
THE
FALL
.
REGINALD
Tracy
returned
to
his
own
abode
,
his
breast
agitated
with
a
variety
of
conflicting
feelings
.
He
pushed
his
old
housekeeper
,
who
announced
to
him
that
dinner
was
ready
,
rudely
aside
,
and
hurried
up
to
his
own
chamber
.
There
he
threw
himself
upon
his
knees
,
and
endeavoured
to
pray
to
be
released
from
temptation
.
For
he
now
comprehended
all
the
dangers
which
beset
him
,
although
he
suspected
not
the
perfidy
and
artifice
of
the
tempter
.
But
not
a
word
of
supplication
could
he
utter
from
the
mouth
which
still
burned
with
the
thrilling
kisses
of
the
beautiful
Cecilia
.
He
rose
from
his
knees
,
and
paced
the
room
wildly
,
—
at
one
moment
vowing
never
to
see
that
syren
more
,
—
at
another
longing
to
rush
back
to
her
arms
.
The
animal
passions
of
that
man
were
strong
by
nature
and
threatened
to
be
insatiable
whenever
let
loose
;
but
they
had
slumbered
from
his
birth
,
beneath
the
lethargic
influence
of
high
principle
and
asceticism
.
Moreover
,
they
had
never
been
tempted
until
the
present
time
;
and
now
that
temptation
came
so
suddenly
,
and
in
so
sweet
a
guise
,
—
came
with
such
irresistible
blandishments
,
—
came
,
in
a
word
,
so
accompanied
with
all
that
could
flatter
his
vanity
or
minister
unto
his
pride
,
—
that
he
knew
not
how
to
resist
its
influence
.
And
at
one
moment
that
man
of
unblemished
character
and
lofty
principle
fell
upon
his
knees
,
grovelling
as
it
were
at
the
foot-stool
of
Him
whom
he
served
,
—
anxious
,
yearning
to
crave
for
courage
to
escape
from
the
peril
that
awaited
him
,
—
and
yet
unable
to
breathe
a
syllable
of
prayer
.
Then
he
walked
in
a
wild
and
excited
manner
up
and
down
,
murmuring
the
name
of
Cecilia
,
—
pondering
upon
her
charms
,
—
plunging
into
voluptuous
reveries
and
dreams
of
vaguely
comprehended
bliss
,
—
until
his
desires
became
of
that
fiery
,
hot
,
and
unruly
nature
,
which
triumphed
over
all
other
considerations
.
It
was
an
interesting
—
and
yet
an
awful
spectacle
,
to
behold
that
man
,
who
could
look
back
over
a
life
of
spotless
and
unblemished
purity
,
now
engaged
in
a
terrific
warfare
with
the
demons
of
passion
that
were
raging
to
cast
off
their
chains
,
and
were
struggling
furiously
for
dominion
over
the
proud
being
who
had
hitherto
held
them
in
silence
and
in
bondage
.
But
those
demons
had
acquired
strength
during
their
long
repose
;
and
now
that
the
day
of
rebellion
had
arrived
,
they
maintained
an
avenging
and
desperate
conflict
with
him
who
had
long
been
their
master
.
They
were
like
a
people
goaded
to
desperation
by
the
atrocities
of
a
blood-thirsty
tyrant
:
they
fought
a
battle
in
which
there
was
to
be
no
quarter
,
but
wherein
one
side
or
the
other
must
succumb
.
Hour
after
hour
passed
;
and
still
he
sustained
the
conflict
with
the
new
feelings
which
had
been
excited
within
him
,
and
which
were
rapidly
crushing
all
the
better
sentiments
of
his
soul
.
At
length
he
retired
to
bed
,
a
prey
to
a
mental
uneasiness
which
amounted
to
a
torture
.
His
sleep
was
agitated
and
filled
with
visions
by
no
means
calculated
to
calm
the
fever
of
his
blood
.
He
awoke
in
the
morning
excited
,
unsettled
,
and
with
a
desperate
longing
after
pleasures
which
were
as
yet
vague
and
undefined
to
him
.
But
still
a
sense
of
the
awful
danger
which
menaced
him
stole
into
his
mind
from
time
to
time
;
and
he
shuddered
as
if
he
were
about
to
commit
a
crime
.
He
left
the
table
,
where
the
morning
's
meal
was
untasted
,
and
repaired
to
his
study
.
But
his
books
had
no
longer
any
charm
for
him
:
he
could
not
settle
his
mind
to
read
or
write
.
He
went
out
,
and
rambled
in
all
directions
,
reckless
whither
he
went
—
but
anxious
to
throw
off
the
spell
which
had
fallen
upon
him
.
Vain
was
this
attempt
.
The
air
was
piercing
and
cold
;
but
his
brow
was
burning
.
He
felt
that
his
cheeks
were
flushed
;
and
his
eyes
seemed
to
shoot
forth
fire
.
"
My
God
!
what
is
the
matter
with
me
?
"
he
exclaimed
,
in
his
anguish
,
as
he
entered
Hyde
Park
,
the
comparative
loneliness
of
which
at
that
season
he
thought
calculated
to
soothe
his
troubled
thoughts
.
"
I
have
tried
to
pray
—
and
last
night
,
for
the
first
time
in
my
life
,
I
sought
my
pillow
,
unable
to
implore
the
blessings
of
my
Maker
.
Oh
!
what
spell
has
overtaken
me
?
what
influence
is
upon
me
?
Cecilia
—
Cecilia
—
is
it
indeed
thou
that
hast
thus
changed
me
?
"
He
went
on
,
—
now
musing
upon
all
that
had
passed
within
the
few
preceding
days
—
now
breaking
forth
into
wild
and
passionate
exclamations
.
He
left
the
Park
,
and
walked
rapidly
through
the
streets
of
the
West
End
.
"
No
,
"
he
said
within
himself
,
"
I
will
never
see
her
more
.
I
will
conquer
these
horrible
feelings
—
I
will
triumph
over
the
mad
desires
,
the
fiery
cravings
which
have
converted
the
heaven
of
my
heart
into
a
raging
hell
!
Oh
!
why
is
she
so
beautiful
?
why
did
she
say
that
she
loved
me
?
Was
it
to
disturb
me
in
my
peaceful
career
—
to
wean
me
from
my
God
?
No
—
no
:
she
yielded
to
an
impulse
which
she
could
not
control
;
—
she
loves
me
—
she
loves
me
—
she
loves
me
!
"
There
was
a
species
of
insanity
in
his
manner
as
he
thus
addressed
himself
,
—
not
speaking
with
the
lips
,
but
with
the
heart
,
—
unheard
by
those
who
passed
him
by
,
but
with
a
voice
which
vibrated
like
thunder
in
his
own
ears
.
"
Yes
—
she
loves
me
,
"
he
continued
;
"
but
I
must
fly
from
her
—
I
must
avoid
her
as
if
she
were
a
venomous
serpent
.
I
dare
not
trust
myself
again
in
her
presence
:
and
not
for
worlds
—
not
for
worlds
would
I
be
with
her
alone
once
more
.
No
,
—
I
must
forget
her
—
I
must
tear
her
image
from
my
heart
—
I
must
trample
it
under
foot
!
"
He
paused
as
he
spoke
:
he
stood
still
—
for
he
was
exhausted
.
But
how
was
it
that
the
demon
of
mischief
had
,
with
an
under-current
of
irresistible
influence
,
carried
him
on
,
in
spite
of
the
forceful
flow
of
the
above
reflections
,
to
the
very
goal
of
destruction
!
He
was
in
Tavistock
Square
.
He
was
at
the
door
of
Lady
Cecilia
Harborough
's
house
.
And
now
for
one
minute
a
terrific
conflict
again
raged
within
him
.
It
seemed
as
if
he
collected
all
his
remaining
courage
to
struggle
with
the
demons
in
his
heart
;
but
he
was
weak
with
the
protracted
contest
—
and
they
were
more
powerful
than
ever
.
"
I
will
see
her
once
more
,
"
he
said
,
yielding
to
the
influence
of
his
passions
:
"
I
will
tell
her
that
I
stand
upon
an
abyss
—
I
will
implore
her
to
have
mercy
upon
me
,
and
permit
me
to
retreat
ere
yet
it
be
too
late
!
"
His
good
genius
held
him
faintly
back
;
but
his
passions
goaded
him
on
:
he
obeyed
the
latter
impulse
;
he
rushed
up
the
steps
and
knocked
at
the
door
.
"
Even
now
I
might
retreat
,
"
he
said
to
himself
:
"
there
is
still
time
!
I
will
—
I
will
!
"
He
turned
,
and
was
already
half-way
down
the
steps
,
when
the
door
was
opened
.
His
good
resolutions
vanished
,
and
he
entered
the
house
.
In
a
few
moments
more
he
was
in
the
presence
of
Lady
Cecilia
,
—
Lady
Cecilia
—
looking
more
bewitching
,
more
captivating
than
ever
!
She
had
expected
him
,
and
had
resolved
that
this
visit
,
on
his
part
,
should
crown
her
triumph
.
It
was
in
a
small
parlour
adjoining
her
own
boudoir
that
she
received
him
.
The
luxurious
sofa
was
placed
near
the
cheerful
fire
:
the
heavy
curtains
were
drawn
over
the
windows
in
such
a
manner
as
to
darken
the
room
.
Cecilia
was
attired
in
a
black
silk
dress
,
that
she
had
purposely
chosen
to
enhance
the
transparent
brilliancy
of
her
complexion
,
and
to
display
the
dazzling
whiteness
of
a
bust
,
which
,
though
of
small
proportions
,
was
of
perfect
contour
.
She
was
reclining
languidly
upon
the
cushions
which
were
piled
on
one
end
of
the
sofa
,
and
her
little
feet
peeped
from
beneath
the
skirts
of
her
dress
.
She
did
not
rise
when
Reginald
entered
the
room
,
but
invited
him
to
take
a
seat
near
her
upon
the
sofa
.
So
bewitchingly
beautiful
did
she
appear
,
as
the
strong
glare
of
the
fire
played
upon
her
countenance
,
amidst
the
semi-obscurity
of
the
room
,
that
he
could
not
resist
the
signal
.
He
accordingly
sate
down
by
her
side
.
"
Your
visit
to-day
,
"
said
Cecilia
,
"
proves
to
me
that
you
have
forgiven
the
indiscreet
confession
into
which
I
was
yesterday
led
in
a
moment
of
weakness
.
"
"
I
am
come
as
a
friend
—
as
a
true
and
sincere
friend
,
"
returned
Reginald
,
with
considerable
emphasis
upon
the
last
word
.
"
But
I
know
not
whether
my
occupations
,
my
duties
,
in
a
word
—
will
permit
me
to
visit
you
again
for
some
time
—
—
"
"
Oh
!
do
not
deprive
me
of
the
pleasure
of
your
society
from
time
to
time
,
"
interrupted
Cecilia
,
divining
all
that
was
passing
in
the
rector
's
soul
,
and
well
aware
,
by
the
tremulous
tone
in
which
he
spoke
,
that
his
good
resolutions
were
but
unequal
opponents
to
the
fury
of
his
newly
awakened
passions
.
"
Listen
,
Lady
Cecilia
,
"
answered
Reginald
;
"
and
I
will
tell
you
frankly
the
real
motives
which
most
compel
me
to
forego
the
pleasure
of
your
society
in
future
.
I
tremble
for
myself
!
"
"
You
tremble
for
yourself
!
"
repeated
Cecilia
,
with
ill-concealed
joy
.
"
Do
you
think
me
,
then
,
so
very
formidable
?
"
"
Formidable
—
oh
!
no
,
"
ejaculated
Reginald
,
darting
an
impassioned
glance
upon
his
ravishing
companion
.
"
But
I
consider
that
you
are
very
beautiful
—
too
beautiful
for
me
thus
to
seek
your
presence
with
impunity
.
"
"
Then
would
you
sever
that
bond
of
friendship
which
you
yourself
proposed
so
generously
,
so
kindly
?
"
asked
Lady
Cecilia
,
placing
her
hand
upon
that
of
the
rector
,
and
approaching
her
countenance
towards
his
as
if
to
read
the
answer
in
his
eyes
.
"
It
must
be
so
—
it
must
be
so
—
for
my
peace
of
mind
,
Cecilia
!
"
cried
Reginald
,
thrilled
by
that
electric
touch
,
and
receiving
into
his
own
soul
no
small
portion
of
that
same
voluptuousness
which
animated
the
fair
patrician
at
that
moment
.
"
It
must
be
so
,
—
oh
!
cruel
resolve
!
"
said
Cecilia
,
pressing
his
hand
between
both
of
hers
.
"
But
let
me
not
advance
my
selfish
feelings
as
a
barrier
to
your
interest
.
Oh
!
no
,
Reginald
—
I
would
sacrifice
every
thing
to
give
you
pleasure
!
You
shall
go
—
you
shall
leave
me
;
but
you
will
sometimes
think
of
me
—
you
will
occasionally
devote
a
thought
to
her
who
has
dared
to
love
you
!
"
"
Dared
to
love
me
!
"
exclaimed
the
rector
;
—
"
and
what
if
I
—
—
but
no
—
it
is
madness
!
"
"
Speak
—
tell
me
what
you
were
about
to
say
,
"
murmured
Cecilia
,
in
a
melting
tone
.
"
I
was
on
the
point
of
asking
what
you
would
think
—
what
opinion
you
would
form
of
me
,
if
I
were
to
confess
that
I
also
dared
to
love
you
?
"
"
I
should
reply
that
such
happiness
never
could
descend
upon
me
,
"
said
Cecilia
.
"
And
yet
it
is
true
—
it
is
true
!
I
cannot
conceal
it
from
myself
,
"
exclaimed
Reginald
,
giving
way
to
the
influence
of
his
emotions
:
"
it
is
true
that
I
love
you
!
"
"
Oh
!
am
I
indeed
so
blest
?
"
faltered
Cecilia
.
"
Tell
me
once
more
that
you
love
me
!
"
"
Love
you
!
"
cried
the
rector
,
unable
to
wrestle
longer
with
his
mad
desires
:
"
I
worship
—
I
adore
you
—
I
will
die
for
you
!
"
He
caught
her
in
his
arms
,
and
covered
her
with
burning
and
impassioned
kisses
.
Oh
,
Reginald
!
and
hast
thou
at
length
fallen
?
Have
a
few
short
days
sufficed
to
undo
and
render
as
naught
the
purity
—
the
chastity
of
years
?
Where
was
thy
guardian
angel
in
that
hour
?
Whither
had
fled
that
proud
virtue
which
raised
thee
so
high
above
thy
fellow-men
,
and
which
gave
to
thine
eloquence
the
galvanic
effect
of
the
most
sublime
truth
?
Look
back
—
look
back
,
with
bitterness
and
sorrow
,
upon
the
brilliant
career
through
which
thou
hast
run
up
to
this
hour
,
and
curse
the
madness
that
prompted
thee
to
darken
so
bright
a
destiny
!
For
thou
hast
plucked
thine
own
crown
of
integrity
from
thy
brow
,
and
hast
trampled
it
under
foot
.
Henceforth
,
in
thine
own
heart
,
wilt
thou
know
thyself
as
a
hypocrite
and
a
deceiver
!
It
was
past
eleven
o'clock
when
Reginald
Tracy
issued
from
the
abode
of
Lady
Cecilia
Harborough
.
The
night
was
dark
;
but
from
time
to
time
the
moon
shone
for
a
short
interval
,
as
the
clouds
were
swept
away
from
its
face
.
Reginald
paused
for
a
moment
upon
the
steps
of
the
door
,
and
gazed
upwards
.
The
tempestuous
aspect
of
the
heavens
alarmed
him
;
and
a
superstitious
dread
crept
,
like
a
death-shudder
,
over
his
entire
frame
;
for
it
seemed
to
him
as
if
the
mansion
of
the
Almighty
had
put
on
its
sable
garb
in
mourning
for
a
soul
that
was
lost
unto
the
blessings
of
eternity
.
Deeply
imbued
as
he
was
with
a
sense
of
the
grand
truths
of
the
gospel
,
this
sudden
and
awful
idea
speedily
assumed
so
dread
a
shape
in
his
mind
,
that
he
felt
alarmed
,
as
if
a
tremendous
gulph
were
about
to
open
beneath
his
feet
.
He
hurried
on
,
hoping
to
outstrip
his
thoughts
;
but
that
idea
pursued
him
,
—
haunted
him
,
—
every
moment
increasing
in
terrific
solemnity
,
until
it
wore
the
appearance
of
a
mighty
truth
instead
of
a
phantom
of
the
imagination
.
Again
he
looked
upwards
;
and
the
dense
sombre
clouds
,
which
rolled
rapidly
like
huge
black
billows
over
each
other
,
imparted
fresh
terrors
to
his
guilty
soul
.
Then
his
feverish
and
excited
imagination
began
to
invest
those
clouds
with
fantastic
shapes
;
and
he
traced
in
the
midst
of
the
heavens
a
mighty
black
hand
,
the
fore-finger
of
which
pointed
menacingly
downwards
.
The
more
he
gazed
—
the
more
palpable
to
his
mind
that
apparition
became
.
Half
sinking
with
terror
—
oppressed
with
an
astounding
,
a
crushing
consciousness
of
his
adulterous
guilt
—
the
wretched
man
went
wildly
on
,
reckless
of
the
way
which
he
pursued
,
and
every
minute
casting
horror-stricken
glances
up
to
the
colossal
black
hand
which
seemed
suspended
over
his
head
.
Suddenly
a
deafening
peal
of
thunder
burst
above
him
:
he
looked
frantically
up
—
the
hand
appeared
to
wave
in
a
convulsive
manner
—
then
the
clouds
parted
,
rolling
pell-mell
over
each
other
,
—
and
the
terrific
sign
was
broken
into
a
hundred
moving
masses
.
Never
did
erring
mortal
so
acutely
feel
his
guilt
as
Reginald
Tracy
on
this
fearful
night
.
The
storm
burst
forth
;
and
he
ran
madly
on
,
without
aim
—
a
prey
to
the
most
appalling
reflections
.
It
was
not
of
this
world
that
he
now
thought
,
—
it
was
not
on
its
reproaches
,
its
blame
,
or
its
punishment
,
that
his
mental
looks
were
fixed
;
—
but
it
was
of
eternity
that
he
was
afraid
.
He
trembled
when
he
thought
of
that
Maker
whose
praise
he
had
so
lately
sung
with
pride
,
and
hope
,
and
joy
,
—
and
whose
name
he
dared
not
now
invoke
!
Oh
!
his
punishment
had
already
begun
.
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Weak
,
wearied
,
subdued
,
—
drenched
with
the
rain
that
had
accompanied
the
storm
;
and
in
state
of
mind
bordering
upon
madness
and
despair
,
the
wretched
man
reached
his
home
at
four
o'clock
in
the
morning
.
But
whither
he
had
wandered
,
and
which
way
he
had
taken
,
—
whether
he
had
continued
running
on
,
or
had
rested
once
or
often
during
that
terrific
night
,
he
never
remembered
.
He
retired
to
bed
,
and
slept
during
several
hours
.
When
he
awoke
,
the
sun
was
shining
gloriously
through
his
casement
;
but
the
horrors
and
the
congenial
reflections
of
darkness
had
left
too
fearful
an
impression
upon
his
mind
to
be
readily
effaced
;
for
he
was
not
so
inured
to
vice
as
to
treat
with
levity
the
events
of
the
past
night
,
—
events
which
to
his
superstitious
imagination
had
assumed
the
aspect
of
celestial
warning
and
divine
menace
.
CHAPTER
CXXX
.
MENTAL
STRUGGLES
.
THE
rector
of
Saint
David
's
fell
upon
his
knees
,
and
,
turning
his
face
towards
the
casement
through
which
the
sun
glanced
so
cheerfully
into
the
chamber
,
poured
forth
his
soul
to
the
Being
of
whose
universal
dominion
that
radiance
seemed
an
emblem
.
Reginald
could
now
pray
.
He
had
sinned
deeply
,
and
he
implored
pardon
;
for
he
conceived
that
heaven
had
deigned
to
convey
a
special
warning
to
his
mind
through
the
medium
of
the
clouds
and
the
storm
of
the
preceding
night
.
"
Oh
!
I
am
not
yet
totally
lost
!
"
he
exclaimed
,
joining
his
hands
fervently
together
:
"
I
am
not
yet
an
outcast
from
divine
mercy
!
Heaven
itself
manifests
an
interest
in
my
welfare
:
dare
I
neglect
the
warning
?
No
—
no
!
I
have
sinned
—
but
there
is
repentance
.
Upon
my
otherwise
spotless
life
there
is
one
stain
;
but
tears
of
regret
shall
be
shed
unceasingly
until
the
mark
be
washed
away
!
And
thou
,
temptress
—
never
more
must
we
meet
as
we
have
lately
met
;
I
must
shun
thee
as
my
evil
genius
!
Yet
I
do
not
blame
thee
—
for
I
myself
was
fond
,
and
being
fond
,
was
weak
.
If
I
fell
,
and
can
yet
aspire
to
pardon
and
forgiveness
,
—
I
who
was
strong
,
—
what
extenuation
may
not
exist
for
thee
—
a
poor
,
weak
woman
!
Oh
!
let
the
light
of
divine
grace
shine
in
upon
my
soul
,
even
as
these
bright
beams
of
the
orb
of
day
penetrate
with
cheering
influence
to
my
very
heart
!
Let
me
rise
up
from
the
depths
of
sin
,
stronger
than
when
I
fell
,
—
so
that
sad
experience
may
tend
to
confirm
my
resolves
to
pursue
the
paths
of
chastity
and
virtue
!
"
Thus
spoke
aloud
Reginald
Tracy
,
as
he
knelt
in
his
chamber
the
day
after
his
fall
:
thus
did
he
breathe
vows
of
future
self-denial
and
purity
.
He
rose
resigned
,
and
penitent
,
—
though
at
intervals
a
species
of
struggle
took
place
in
his
breast
—
a
conflict
between
his
recently-experienced
sensations
of
amorous
delight
and
his
present
resolutions
of
abstinence
from
carnal
pleasures
.
In
a
moment
when
his
better
feelings
were
predominant
,
he
wrote
a
brief
letter
to
Lady
Cecilia
,
imploring
her
to
forget
all
that
had
taken
place
between
them
,
and
enjoining
her
,
if
she
entertained
the
slightest
interest
in
his
earthly
and
immortal
welfare
,
never
to
seek
to
see
him
again
.
Then
Reginald
gathered
all
his
most
valued
books
around
him
,
and
plunged
into
his
studies
with
an
earnestness
which
augured
well
for
the
strength
and
permanency
of
his
good
resolutions
.
This
occupation
was
for
a
few
minutes
disturbed
by
a
note
from
Lady
Cecilia
,
imploring
a
last
interview
ere
they
parted
for
ever
:
—
but
the
rector
was
immoveable
in
his
present
precautionary
conduct
;
and
he
answered
her
,
not
angrily
,
but
firmly
,
to
beseech
her
not
to
"
lead
him
into
temptation
.
"
Yes
,
this
man
of
fiery
passions
wrestled
gallantly
with
his
inclinations
:
the
combat
was
at
times
a
fearful
one
;
but
he
exerted
all
his
strength
,
and
all
his
power
,
and
all
his
energy
,
to
subdue
those
desires
which
were
smouldering
,
and
were
not
quenched
,
at
the
bottom
of
his
soul
.
It
was
in
the
evening
of
the
fourth
day
after
the
rector
's
fall
from
the
pedestal
of
his
purity
,
that
his
studies
were
interrupted
by
the
entrance
of
his
housekeeper
,
who
informed
him
that
a
gentleman
desired
to
speak
to
him
.
The
rector
ordered
the
visitor
to
be
admitted
;
and
Mr.
Richard
Markham
was
announced
.
The
object
of
our
hero
's
call
was
speedily
explained
.
Mr.
Monroe
was
lying
in
a
dangerous
state
,
and
his
life
was
despaired
of
.
Mr.
Wentworth
,
the
surgeon
,
who
attended
upon
him
,
had
recommended
him
to
settle
all
his
earthly
affairs
,
and
prepare
his
soul
to
meet
his
Creator
;
and
the
old
man
,
who
was
fully
sensible
of
the
importance
of
this
advice
,
had
expressed
a
wish
to
receive
spiritual
consolation
from
a
minister
whose
sanctity
had
become
proverbial
.
"
The
desire
of
my
dying
friend
,
"
added
Markham
,
"
must
serve
as
an
apology
for
my
intrusion
upon
you
;
but
,
I
implore
you
,
reverend
sir
,
not
to
hesitate
to
soothe
by
your
much-coveted
presence
the
passage
of
a
fellow-creature
from
this
world
to
a
better
.
"
But
for
a
moment
the
rector
did
hesitate
:
—
was
he
fit
to
administer
divine
consolation
to
another
,
—
he
who
was
still
deeply
dyed
with
sin
himself
?
Such
was
the
thought
which
floated
rapidly
through
his
imagination
.
Richard
urged
his
request
with
eloquence
.
Reginald
Tracy
felt
that
he
could
offer
no
sufficient
excuse
,
short
of
the
revelation
of
his
own
guilt
,
for
refusing
to
attend
the
death-bed
of
one
who
craved
his
presence
;
and
he
agreed
to
accompany
the
young
man
to
Markham
Place
.
Richard
had
a
vehicle
at
the
door
;
and
in
a
short
time
they
reached
our
hero
's
abode
.
Reginald
was
conducted
to
the
room
where
Monroe
lay
.
Hanging
over
the
pillow
,
on
which
the
invalid
reclined
,
was
a
charming
female
form
,
from
whose
bosom
deep
sobs
emanated
,
and
rendered
almost
inaudible
the
words
of
strangely
commingled
hope
and
despair
which
she
addressed
to
her
father
.
She
did
not
hear
the
door
open
;
and
it
was
only
when
Richard
approached
the
bed
,
and
whispered
that
the
Reverend
Mr.
Tracy
was
present
,
that
she
raised
her
tearful
countenance
.
Then
did
the
eyes
of
the
rector
glance
upon
one
of
the
most
lovely
beings
whom
Nature
ever
invested
with
all
her
choicest
gifts
;
and
—
even
in
that
solemn
moment
when
he
stood
by
the
bed
of
one
who
was
pronounced
to
be
dying
—
his
soul
was
stirred
by
the
presence
of
that
transcendent
beauty
.
"
Oh
!
sir
,
"
exclaimed
Ellen
,
in
that
musical
voice
which
was
now
rendered
tremulous
by
deep
emotions
,
"
how
grateful
am
I
for
this
prompt
attention
to
the
wish
of
my
dear
—
dear
father
!
"
"
I
deserve
no
gratitude
for
the
performance
of
a
Christian
duty
,
"
answered
the
rector
,
as
he
approached
the
bed
.
Markham
took
Ellen
's
hand
and
led
her
from
the
chamber
,
in
order
to
allow
unrestrained
converse
between
the
clergyman
and
the
invalid
.
An
hour
elapsed
,
and
the
bell
of
the
sick-room
rang
.
Ellen
hurried
thither
,
and
found
her
father
composed
and
resigned
to
meet
his
fate
.
The
rector
sate
by
his
bed-side
.
"
This
holy
man
,
"
said
Monroe
,
"
has
taught
me
how
to
die
like
a
true
Christian
.
Weep
not
,
dearest
Ellen
;
we
shall
meet
again
hereafter
.
"
"
Oh
,
my
dearest
father
,
"
exclaimed
the
young
lady
,
bursting
into
an
agony
of
tears
;
"
it
is
I
—
I
who
have
murdered
you
!
My
conduct
—
—
"
"
Silence
,
Ellen
—
accuse
not
yourself
in
that
dreadful
manner
,
"
interrupted
her
father
.
Reginald
was
astonished
at
the
words
which
had
just
fallen
from
the
daughter
's
lips
;
and
he
surveyed
her
with
increased
interest
and
curiosity
.
At
that
moment
Mr.
Wentworth
entered
the
room
.
He
found
the
invalid
better
,
and
his
countenance
was
animated
with
a
ray
of
hope
.
This
expression
of
his
inward
feelings
was
not
lost
upon
Ellen
;
and
she
interrogated
him
with
a
rapid
and
imploring
glance
.
"
Mr.
Monroe
must
be
kept
very
—
very
quiet
,
"
said
the
surgeon
in
a
whisper
,
which
was
addressed
to
both
Ellen
and
Reginald
Tracy
.
"
And
then
—
there
is
hope
?
"
murmured
Ellen
in
breathless
suspense
.
"
Yes
—
there
is
hope
,
"
repeated
the
surgeon
solemnly
.
"
May
heaven
be
thanked
for
that
assurance
on
your
part
,
"
said
Ellen
,
fervently
.
The
rector
contemplated
her
with
an
admiration
which
he
could
not
restrain
;
and
,
in
spite
of
himself
,
the
thought
flashed
across
his
mind
,
how
far
more
lovely
was
Miss
Ellen
Monroe
than
Lady
Cecilia
Harborough
!
Then
,
indignant
with
himself
for
having
allowed
the
comparison
to
force
itself
upon
his
attention
,
he
rose
to
take
his
departure
.
The
invalid
had
just
sunk
into
a
deep
slumber
;
and
Mr.
Wentworth
intimated
his
intention
of
passing
the
night
by
his
side
.
"
I
will
call
again
to-morrow
morning
,
"
said
Reginald
,
addressing
Miss
Monroe
;
"
for
I
perceive
that
this
gentleman
is
not
without
hopes
.
"
"
Thank
you
—
thank
you
,
sir
,
for
your
kindness
,
"
answered
Ellen
with
grateful
enthusiasm
.
"
Your
presence
seems
to
have
brought
a
blessing
into
this
sick-room
.
"
She
extended
her
hand
towards
him
,
and
he
pressed
it
for
a
moment
in
his
.
His
whole
frame
seemed
electrified
with
a
sudden
glow
;
and
he
hurried
somewhat
abruptly
from
the
room
.
When
he
reached
his
own
abode
once
more
,
he
felt
a
profound
melancholy
steal
into
his
soul
;
for
he
seemed
more
lonely
,
and
more
solitary
than
he
ever
yet
had
been
.
He
retired
to
rest
,
and
his
dreams
were
filled
with
the
images
of
Cecilia
and
Ellen
.
When
he
awoke
in
the
morning
,
he
was
discontented
with
himself
—
with
the
whole
world
:
he
experienced
vague
longings
after
excitement
or
change
of
scene
;
—
he
could
not
settle
himself
,
as
on
the
four
previous
days
,
to
his
studies
—
his
books
were
hateful
to
him
.
He
wandered
about
his
house
—
from
room
to
room
—
as
if
in
search
of
something
which
he
could
not
define
,
and
which
he
did
not
discover
:
he
was
pursued
by
ideas
only
dimly
comprehensible
,
but
which
were
at
variance
with
his
recently
formed
resolutions
of
purity
and
virtue
.
He
was
restless
—
discontented
—
uneasy
.
At
length
he
remembered
his
promise
to
return
to
Markham
Place
.
The
idea
seemed
to
give
him
pleasure
:
he
longed
to
see
Ellen
Monroe
once
more
;
—
and
yet
he
did
not
choose
to
make
this
admission
to
himself
.
With
a
beating
heart
did
he
cross
the
threshold
of
the
house
in
which
that
delightful
vision
had
burst
,
as
it
