cannothelp
now
except
by
being
silent
.
Later
,
perhaps
,
—
good-night
.
”
PHASE
THIRD
CHAPTER
I
IT
was
not
,
I
must
admit
,
without
a
certain
movement
of
relief
I
learned
,
on
inquiry
,
from
the
head
waiter
—
who
graciously
condescended
himself
to
serve
my
breakfast
on
the
verandah
outside
the
salle
à
manger
—
next
morning
,
that
Leversedge
had
left
for
Geneva
by
the
first
train
.
As
I
have
remarked
already
,
I
adore
drama
.
It
is
among
the
best
of
the
several
good
things
of
life
;
but
it
is
,
I
must
add
,
among
the
good
things
of
which
it
is
quite
possible
to
have
enough
.
And
I
had
really
had
about
enough
of
it
on
the
previous
evening
.
I
hailed
a
pause
.
I
did
more
.
I
took
an
early
boat
to
Evian
,
and
refreshed
my
soul
by
a
Platonic
luncheon
—
in
a
delightfully
cool
atmosphere
both
physical
and
sentimental
—
in
company
with
the
friend
who
does
not
enter
into
this
history
,
and
whom
,
therefore
,
I
have
already
expressed
a
desire
to
leave
out
of
it
.
Coming
back
,
since
the
afternoon
was
very
charming
,
instead
of
crossing
directly
to
Ouchy
,
I
took
the
boat
to
the
head
of
the
lake
.
The
chestnut
woods
above
St.
Gingolph
held
the
sunshine
in
an
enchanting
manner
,
I
remember
.
I
wished
to
think
about
these
woods
,
about
the
humours
of
my
fellow-passengers
,
about
the
gossip
of
the
fair
friend
from
whom
I
had
just
parted
;
but
,
unfortunately
,
I
found
it
impossible
wholly
to
banish
memories
of
,
and
speculations
concerning
,
the
Perry-Leversedge
situation
from
my
mind
.
The
occasions
upon
which
one
witnesses
strong
emotion
in
real
life
are
rare
,
and
that
which
one
does
witness
on
such
rare
occasions
is
haunting
.
It
was
borne
in
upon
me
how
very
much
more
effective
and
penetrating
strong
emotion
is
off
,
than
on
,
the
stage
;
how
nature
,
notwithstanding
her
obvious
crudities
,
strikes
home
,
as
art
,
I
deeply
regret
to
allow
it
,
never
can
.
Last
night
Leversedge
had
been
fine
.
Charlotte
Perry
had
been
fine
—
with
a
difference
.
Even
Gerrard
had
played
a
telling
part
,
in
his
own
objectionable
way
.
And
there
I
paused
.
For
my
own
action
appeared
to
me
wholly
insipid
.
I
had
occupied
the
inglorious
position
of
the
“
buffer
state
.
”
Only
once
had
I
taken
the
initiative
,
and
then
with
what
disastrous
results
!
I
could
not
,
moreover
,
acquit
myself
of
a
certain
pusillanimity
in
leaving
Miss
Perry
,
though
she
did
,
I
own
,
appear
perfectly
equal
to
managing
her
own
affairs
.
No
,
I
was
not
proud
of
myself
.
And
then
little
incidents
began
to
recur
to
me
which
were
somewhat
incomprehensible
.
In
that
matter
of
putting
out
the
lights
,
now
,
was
it
a
plant
?
—
had
there
been
any
collusion
between
Percy
Gerrard
and
Miss
Perry
?
I
was
busy
with
this
difficult
and
not
very
pleasing
problem
when
,
on
trans-shipping
at
Villeneuve
,
Mr.
Perry
himself
hailed
my
advent
upon
the
upper
deck
of
the
lake-boat
.
“
Well
met
!
”
he
cried
.
“
As
ever
the
truly
welcome
friend
.
”
There
was
,
if
I
may
put
it
so
,
an
air
of
high-class-bank-holiday
about
Mr.
Perry
.
It
is
an
air
calculated
to
render
a
hearty
reception
by
the
possessor
of
it
peculiarly
gratifying
to
one
,
specially
when
the
said
reception
happens
to
take
place
in
public
.
The
occupants
of
the
benches
under
the
awning
—
the
lean
and
active
Americans
;
the
large
and
affectionate
Germans
;
the
English
clergy
in
mufti
,
surrounded
by
their
harems
;
even
those
very
superior
persons
,
the
schoolmasters
in
knickerbockers
,
bearing
the
impressive
effect
of
universal
proprietorship
which
covers
them
immediately
upon
crossing
the
channel
,
and
remains
so
engagingly
by
them
until
they
regain
their
native
shore
,
—
even
these
turned
to
gaze
at
Mr.
Perry
and
my
all
too
greatly
honoured
self
.
Mr.
Perry
had
a
courier
bag
slung
across
his
shoulders
;
under
one
arm
he
carried
a
bulky
white
umbrella
.
He
had
field-glasses
in
his
hand
.
To-day
,
alas
!
he
wore
a
new
hat
.
It
was
high
,
made
of
soft
grey
felt
,
and
had
a
deep
cleft
,
an
absolute
ravine
,
down
the
middle
of
the
crown
.
Of
all
European
countries
known
to
me
,
Switzerland
undoubtedly
produces
the
most
unholy
headgear
,
both
male
and
female
.
Mr.
Perry
's
hat
was
of
local
manufacture
.
It
was
surrounded
,
moreover
,
by
a
black
and
white
pugaree
that
had
seen
service
,
the
stringy
ends
of
it
streaming
afar
upon
the
breeze
as
the
little
man
perambulated
the
deck
.
Mr.
Perry
was
full
of
conversation
.
“
I
am
here
with
my
daughter
,
”
he
told
me
.
“
She
is
unstrung
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
—
slightly
unstrung
.
Perfect
health
,
really
perfect
,
I
assure
you
;
but
a
delicate
,
a
highly
nervous
organisation
.
And
marriage
is
a
serious
step
;
it
is
,
I
think
I
may
even
say
,
an
arduous
undertaking
—
for
some
of
us
,
I
am
sure
,
very
arduous
.
To
leave
home
and
kindred
,
to
quit
the
dear
old
family
roof
”
—
(
at
Château
Perry
,
one
wondered
,
did
they
habitually
camp
out
,
catlike
,
among
the
chimney-pots
?
)
,
—
“
must
of
necessity
cause
a
pang
,
—
aye
,
more
than
one
—
quite
a
number
of
pangs
in
fact
,
to
any
highly
sensitive
heart
.
”
I
expressed
my
regret
for
Miss
Perry
's
indisposition
,
and
added
a
hope
it
was
but
of
a
passing
,
character
.
“
I
trust
so
,
”
he
replied
.
“
But
I
cannot
disguise
from
myself
that
my
daughter
appears
depressed
.
These
delicate
young
creatures
are
so
full
of
feeling
—
Fair
English
girl
,
whose
mantling
cheek
Forbids
the
words
her
lips
would
speak
.
Yes
,
yes
—
so
I
invited
her
to
come
out
with
me
.
And
Mamma
approved
the
plan
,
I
am
happy
to
state
,
—
entirely
approved
it
.
The
aspect
of
outward
nature
upon
this
truly
glorious
summer
afternoon
would
,
I
felt
convinced
,
prove
an
antidote
to
gloomy
thoughts
.
And
hence
you
find
us
here
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
—
hence
you
find
us
;
and
very
happy
indeed
we
are
to
be
found
,
I
can
assure
you
.
”
While
making
these
pleasing
remarks
,
Mr.
Perry
pursued
his
course
along
the
deck
towards
the
stern
of
the
boat
.
The
wooded
precipices
behind
Chillon
fled
away
upon
our
left
.
Before
us
stretched
out
the
immense
,
blue
perspective
of
the
Rhone
Valley
.
Vast
shadows
lay
across
it
,
soft
and
misty
;
while
here
and
there
the
flanks
of
the
great
hills
,
a
row
of
balsam
poplars
on
the
flat
,
or
the
windows
of
a
châlet
caught
the
mellow
brightness
of
the
western
sun
.
Everybody
knows
the
view
very
well
;
still
it
remains
delicious
—
delicious
even
though
Perry
père
,
in
the
tones
of
one
returning
thanks
for
the
bridesmaids
at
a
suburban
wedding-breakfast
,
prattles
at
one
's
side
.
“
I
am
myself
aware
,
”
he
continued
,
“
how
when
harassed
by
the
calls
of
business
and
by
those
anxieties
which
the
fluctuations
of
the
money
market
necessarily
produce
in
the
breast
even
of
the
most
sanguine
and
the
most
solvent
,
—
I
am
aware
how
a
few
hours
,
spent
in
one
of
the
sequestered
country
spots
,
of
which
our
dear
sea-girt
land
supplies
so
many
charming
examples
,
will
restore
a
measure
of
energy
to
the
jaded
nervous
system
,
and
promote
a
healthy
,
hopeful
outlook
upon
our
present
form
of
existence
.
For
though
,
”
cried
Mr.
Perry
,
drawing
himself
up
in
a
bold
and
reckless
manner
,
and
slipping
his
disengaged
hand
in
between
the
buttons
of
his
insufficiently
brushed
waistcoat
,
—
“
though
through
circumstances
I
occupy
the
position
of
a
peaceful
citizen
,
I
am
by
nature
a
roamer
.
These
snowy
summits
seem
to
call
me
—
”
Here
he
waved
his
field-glasses
dramatically
towards
the
circle
of
mountains
closing
in
the
head
of
the
valley
.
“
I
envy
the
agile
chamois
leaping
from
rock
to
rock
with
dilated
nostril
.
I
long
to
inhale
the
invigorating
atmosphere
of
those
amazing
altitudes
.
And
the
ocean
,
again
,
”
added
Mr.
Perry
;
“
the
sound
of
it
is
,
as
I
may
say
,
positively
in
my
blood
.
Often
in
my
boyhood
—
Dear
bygone
time
when
youth
's
enchanted
hand
Smoothed
the
light
curl
,
caressed
the
candid
brow
—
”
Here
he
smiled
with
a
kind
of
a
noble
coyness
.
—
“
Often
in
my
boyhood
,
when
pacing
the
arid
London
pavement
,
have
I
paused
and
picked
up
a
whelk
dropped
from
the
barrow
of
the
itinerant
coster
;
and
,
holding
the
home
of
the
humble
mollusc
to
my
ear
,
have
found
solace
and
sweet
suggestion
of
liberty
in
the
murmur
of
the
shell
.
Poetry
,
my
dear
Mr.
Hammond
,
believe
me
,
in
the
end
we
must
all
come
back
to
that
,
—
and
a
very
wholesome
thing
it
is
to
come
back
to
,
I
'm
sure
,
very
wholesome
.
”
We
turned
,
and
I
perceived
the
daughter
of
my
eloquent
companion
in
the
open
space
at
the
far
end
of
the
deck
,
beyond
the
shadow
of
the
awning
.
She
was
seated
upon
a
low
camp-stool
,
at
a
distance
from
all
the
other
passengers
,
a
study
in
brown-holland
,
under
a
large
black
and
yellow
parasol
.
Nobody
was
in
attendance
.
Miss
Perry
for
once
was
alone
.
“
Mamma
,
now
,
is
different
,
”
resumed
Mr.
Perry
.
“
Travel
for
her
has
few
attractions
.
A
home-loving
nature
,
the
fireside
,
the
bright
flower
border
,
the
prolific
vegetable
garden
,
—
these
content
the
heart
of
Mamma
,
as
does
the
round
of
her
domestic
duties
.
—
‘A
wet
sheet
and
a
flowing
sail’
—
fine
old
song
that
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
and
full
of
the
true
British
nautical
spirit
—
exercise
no
fascination
over
her
.
And
so
we
left
her
at
the
hotel
this
afternoon
;
we
did
not
bring
her
with
us
.
Indeed
,
”
he
added
,
lowering
his
voice
,
“
I
may
tell
you
,
in
confidence
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
—
you
,
are
a
man
of
the
world
,
which
is
equivalent
to
saying
that
you
know
something
of
the
feminine
nature
,
—
I
was
not
altogether
sorry
to
part
my
two
ladies
for
a
little
while
to-day
,
not
altogether
sorry
to
part
them
.
A
passing
cloud
,
no
more
,
—
I
am
sure
quite
passing
,
—
crossed
the
face
,
as
I
may
say
,
of
our
family
happiness
.
Just
a
momentary
lack
of
unanimity
of
sentiment
between
the
child
and
her
maternal
parent
.
Mamma
had
heard
rumours
—
the
confused
indiscretion
of
an
officious
chambermaid
—
the
sex
will
gossip
,
as
you
know
—
of
something
that
happened
last
night
.
”
Mr.
Perry
looked
sharply
at
me
.
“
Last
night
?
—
Indeed
?
”
I
said
.
“
A
—
in
short
—
a
scene
—
”
repeated
Mr.
Perry
.
“
A
scene
?
”
I
inquired
.
“
You
were
there
,
I
believe
,
Mr.
Hammond
.
”
“
Certainly
,
I
was
there
all
the
time
.
Your
daughter
played
to
us
as
—
well
,
as
I
really
think
only
your
daughter
can
play
.
”
The
boat
slowed
up
at
the
debarcadère
of
Territet-Chillon
,
just
below
the
extensive
constructions
of
the
Grand
Hôtel
des
Alpes
.
Mr.
Perry
held
on
to
the
starboard
railings
and
scrutinised
the
on-coming
passengers
.
Among
them
chanced
to
be
the
retired
Deputy
Surgeon-General
of
the
Madras
Army
,
his
face
showing
leaden
under
his
white
solar
topee
.
Mr.
Perry
leaned
out
over
the
starboard
railing
and
signalled
to
him
with
his
umbrella
.
Then
he
addressed
me
again
.
“
You
relieve
me
of
anxiety
,
”
he
said
,
—
“
greatly
relieve
me
.
Mrs.
Perry
is
slightly
wanting
in
diplomacy
at
times
;
and
she
has
,
perhaps
,
views
of
the
duties
of
a
chaperon
belonging
to
less
advanced
and
cultivated
social
conditions
than
those
in
which
it
is
the
habit
of
our
daughter
to
move
.
She
questioned
Charlotte
.
”
Again
Mr.
Perry
looked
very
sharply
at
me
.
“
A
mistake
,
”
he
added
,
“
and
one
which
I
myself
should
have
been
incapable
of
committing
—
though
not
perhaps
an
unnatural
one
in
an
anxious
mother
.
And
—
ah
!
here
is
our
good
friend
the
doctor
.
Botanising
I
see
,
as
usual
.
No
naughty
poppies
,
I
trust
,
annoying
your
eye
in
those
delightful
Alpine
solitudes
—
ah
!
ha
—
eh
,
no
naughty
poppies
?
”
CHAPTER
II
I
APPROACHED
Miss
Perry
.
Her
reception
of
me
was
not
enthusiastic
;
in
fact
for
some
seconds
she
appeared
unaware
of
my
presence
.
She
had
taken
off
her
large
,
lace
hat
and
thrown
it
on
the
deck
beside
her
.
Her
face
and
upper
portion
of
her
figure
were
shaded
by
her
parasol
;
the
yellow
and
black
frills
of
which
,
like
the
short
curly
hair
about
her
forehead
and
the
nape
of
her
neck
,
were
uplifted
and
softly
dropped
again
by
the
warm
wind
.
Her
head
was
turned
away
;
I
could
only
see
the
outline
of
her
cheek
.
She
had
,
I
remember
,
unfastened
the
collar
of
her
yellow
silk
blouse
,
thereby
exposing
rather
more
of
her
throat
than
is
customary
in
morning
dress
.
A
bunch
of
buttercups
was
stuck
in
her
waistband
.
They
drooped
with
the
heat
,
some
were
crushed
and
broken
,
as
though
in
sympathy
with
their
wearer
.
For
Miss
Perry
drooped
too
,
was
crushed
too
.
Her
whole
attitude
betokened
this
in
the
most
touching
manner
.
To
recognise
in
this
withdrawn
and
pensive
figure
the
player
of
the
evil
witch-music
of
last
night
,
or
the
very
capable
woman
who
had
bidden
me
,
so
peremptorily
,
leave
her
to
manage
her
own
affairs
,
was
a
heavy
tax
on
my
imagination
.
If
change
is
essential
to
charm
in
woman
,
then
Miss
Perry
was
triumphantly
charming
,
for
her
capacity
of
change
was
Protean
.
As
the
steamer-bell
ceased
ringing
and
the
decks
began
to
vibrate
with
the
working
of
the
engines
,
Miss
Perry
turned
her
head
.
She
gazed
at
me
mutely
.
Her
eyes
were
full
of
tears
,
her
dark
eyelashes
were
gathered
into
little
points
by
those
she
had
already
shed
.
“
You
do
not
care
to
talk
,
”
I
said
.
“
Your
father
tells
me
you
are
over-tired
.
You
would
rather
have
me
go
away
.
”
“
No
,
”
she
replied
.
“
There
are
things
of
which
I
must
speak
to
you
.
I
should
not
myself
perhaps
have
chosen
to-day
,
for
I
have
hardly
arranged
my
thought
as
yet
.
I
can
hardly
see
my
trouble
,
or
my
action
,
still
less
my
future
”
—
the
girl
paused
,
and
two
tears
rolled
slowly
down
over
her
pretty
red-brown
cheeks
—
“
in
perspective
.
It
is
all
too
close
to
me
as
yet
.
Still
,
perhaps
this
opportunity
is
given
me
purposely
;
I
dare
not
reject
it
.
It
is
improbable
we
shall
often
see
each
other
alone
again
.
”
I
had
not
been
feeling
altogether
friendly
towards
Charlotte
Perry
.
I
had
doubted
her
,
and
that
on
rather
ugly
grounds
.
And
I
had
not
the
least
proposed
that
our
interview
should
be
of
a
sentimental
character
.
But
listening
to
her
modest
hesitating
speech
,
seeing
her
evident
distress
,
of
course
I
softened
towards
her
and
was
moved
to
sympathy
.
I
am
not
a
stock
or
a
stone
,
so
,
how
the
devil
could
I
help
it
?
“
Whatever
course
events
may
take
,
”
I
protested
,
“
it
will
not
be
my
fault
if
we
do
not
meet
often
hereafter
.
”
“
You
are
hopeful
because
to
you
it
is
a
light
matter
,
”
said
Miss
Perry
.
“
On
the
contrary
,
I
am
hopeful
because
I
am
in
a
normal
condition
,
and
am
therefore
qualified
to
judge
of
the
probabilities
of
things
.
You
are
somewhat
over-tired
.
”
“
Yes
,
I
am
cruelly
tired
,
”
the
girl
assented
.
“
Then
be
advised
,
my
dear
young
lady
,
and
do
not
overtax
yourself
with
the
discussion
of
burning
questions
just
now
.
Tell
me
whether
you
slept
—
no
?
Well
,
I
almost
feared
as
much
,
—
and
then
let
me
do
my
poor
best
to
entertain
you
.
Let
me
talk
to
you
about
the
weather
;
about
our
compagnons
de
voyage
,
whose
voices
reverberate
so
pleasingly
under
that
truly
beautiful
tin
awning
;
about
our
friend
Clement
Bartlett
's
new
play
,
of
which
Carr
writes
me
word
that
it
is
to
be
a
brilliant
success
.
—
Picture
that
!
The
foolish
things
of
this
world
do
indeed
confound
the
wise
at
times
!
Your
memory
happily
cannot
carry
you
back
to
that
prehistoric
period
,
but
I
well
remember
Clement
's
first
appearance
.
Like
the
man
in
‘The
Egoist
,
’
he
‘had
a
leg
,
’
but
this
appeared
to
me
to
constitute
the
whole
of
his
dramatic
outfit
.
And
now
we
are
called
upon
to
hail
him
as
the
coming
play-wright
!
”
“
Is
it
quite
kind
always
to
—
to
scoff
?
”
Charlotte
Perry
asked
very
softly
.
“
Poor
dear
Bartlett
has
survived
so
many
smiles
that
one
more
will
not
greatly
affect
him
—
specially
as
he
will
remain
serenely
unaware
of
it
.
Moreover
,
I
am
past
the
appeals
of
friendship
at
this
moment
;
I
would
ruthlessly
offer
up
the
reputation
of
my
nearest
and
dearest
to
afford
you
a
little
amusement
.
”
Whereat
to
my
extreme
embarrassment
the
girl
bowed
her
head
,
dragged
her
handkerchief
out
of
the
bosom
of
her
blouse
,
and
fell
to
weeping
in
a
perfectly
audible
manner
.
“
Pray
,
pray
do
n't
,
my
dear
Miss
Perry
,
this
is
too
distressing
;
pray
control
yourself
,
”
I
feebly
entreated
.
“
It
is
always
the
same
,
”
she
moaned
—
really
my
position
was
rather
frightful
!
—
“
I
had
hoped
that
for
once
you
would
understand
,
and
treat
me
seriously
—
after
last
night
.
But
it
is
useless
.
Nothing
makes
any
difference
.
You
always
play
with
me
—
because
,
at
heart
,
you
always
despise
me
.
”
“
Despise
you
?
—
good
heavens
!
of
what
imbecility
have
I
been
guilty
now
,
that
you
should
imagine
I
despise
you
?
”
“
When
I
saw
you
coming
,
”
she
sobbed
,
“
I
knew
it
would
be
very
painful
—
I
could
not
speak
at
first
—
but
I
thought
that
the
opportunity
had
been
given
me
,
and
that
I
should
gain
strength
,
and
tell
you
;
and
that
you
would
approve
for
once
—
just
for
once-and
that
would
be
my
compensation
—
but
—
”
As
fate
would
have
it
,
there
was
a
vacant
camp-stool
near
by
.
I
fetched
it
.
I
sat
down
beside
Charlotte
Perry
.
I
took
her
parasol
and
held
it
over
her
.
All
of
which
was
radically
unwise
;
but
under
the
circumstances
what
man
of
feeling
could
be
a
slave
to
discretion
,
that
possibly
better
,
but
certainly
very
cold-blooded
,
part
of
valour
?
The
sun
was
scorching
,
so
that
the
Americans
and
Germans
,
the
clergy
with
their
feminine
appendages
,
and
even
the
possessive
schoolmasters
,
preferred
the
shelter
of
the
awning
to
the
glare
of
the
open
deck
.
For
this
I
returned
heartfelt
thanks
.
Close
scrutiny
would
have
been
intolerably
disconcerting
just
then
.
“
Now
tell
me
anything
and
everything
you
like
,
”
I
said
recklessly
.
“
I
have
been
an
idiot
in
trying
to
divert
your
attention
to
indifferent
matters
.
”
Charlotte
Perry
turned
to
me
with
streaming
eyes
.
She
was
among
the
very
few
women
I
have
ever
known
who
are
not
spoiled
by
crying
.
I
instinctively
tilted
the
parasol
so
as
to
shelter
us
both
,
not
so
much
from
the
rays
of
the
sun
,
as
from
the
remark
of
possible
observers
.
“
I
asked
bread
of
you
,
and
you
seemed
to
give
me
a
stone
.
It
was
too
hard
.
I
lost
myself
—
”
“
No
wonder
,
you
are
over-wrought
,
”
I
answered
.
“
You
went
through
a
most
agitating
experience
last
night
,
and
behaved
—
you
will
not
think
me
guilty
of
impertinence
in
referring
to
this
?
—
with
a
courage
beyond
all
praise
.
”
The
girl
's
mouth
gathered
into
that
strangely
seductive
sketch
of
a
kiss
.
“
Ah
!
how
precious
it
is
to
hear
you
say
that
!
”
she
—
I
do
n't
like
the
word
,
it
has
a
suspicion
of
vulgarity
about
it
,
nevertheless
I
must
employ
it
—
she
whispered
.
I
began
to
speak
,
I
was
on
the
edge
of
committing
myself
to
statements
of
a
vastly
foolish
description
,
but
Miss
Perry
stopped
me
by
raising
her
hand
.
“
Be
silent
,
I
implore
you
,
—
be
silent
.
That
was
a
slip
.
It
would
be
unworthy
of
you
to
notice
it
,
knowing
that
I
am
,
as
you
said
just
now
,
over-wrought
.
Put
it
down
to
my
sleepless
night
,
and
overlook
it
.
”
She
paused
,
and
I
feared
the
tears
would
again
break
forth
.
But
in
a
moment
she
continued
,
with
really
angelic
gentleness
—
“
All
that
is
closed
,
finished
.
After
the
events
of
last
night
,
finished
for
ever
.
Only
sometimes
,
for
an
instant
,
one
forgets
.
If
you
have
once
dreamed
very
vividly
of
a
great
good
,
the
dream
comes
back
upon
you
,
even
in
your
most
cruelly
wakeful
hours
;
do
n't
you
think
so
?
”
“
How
can
I
answer
you
?
”
I
inquired
,
feeling
rather
like
a
knave
and
most
completely
like
a
fool
.
“
Do
n't
attempt
to
answer
,
”
she
said
.
“
Truly
,
it
is
kinder
not
to
do
so
.
Listen
,
that
is
all
I
ask
,
and
if
you
can
,
encourage
and
approve
.
The
hope
”
—
her
voice
sank
away
again
in
a
caressing
cadence
—
“
the
hope
of
your
approval
has
,
I
am
afraid
,
—
for
it
is
very
weak
of
me
,
—
been
the
mainspring
of
my
action
.
”
“
You
humiliate
me
,
”
I
protested
.
The
girl
smiled
at
me
through
her
tears
in
the
most
beguiling
manner
.
“
Had
the
circumstances
of
our
meeting
been
different
,
”
I
said
desperately
,
—
“
had
you
been
free
to
listen
to
proposals
,
which
I
was
equally
and
honourably
free
to
make
,
the
result
of
our
acquaintance
—
”
“
Do
n't
,
”
she
cried
,
shutting
her
eyes
,
and
pressing
her
hands
to
either
side
of
her
charming
head
.
“
This
is
a
superfluous
torture
.
Again
I
entreat
you
to
be
silent
.
I
am
bound
irrevocably
.
I
bound
myself
last
night
,
after
you
went
.
Constantine
was
in
a
terrible
condition
.
Upon
his
frenzy
—
which
you
witnessed
—
there
followed
an
alarming
prostration
.
In
one
and
the
same
breath
he
told
me
—
is
it
indelicate
to
tell
you
this
?
—
that
he
should
die
without
me
,
and
implored
me
to
break
with
him
.
He
said
it
was
wicked
to
marry
me
,
and
yet
declared
that
without
me
he
would
die
.
Indeed
,
I
feared
he
would
destroy
himself
.
”
She
waited
,
shuddering
,
closing
her
eyes
,
again
pressing
her
hands
against
her
head
.
“
I
realised
clearly
,
for
the
first
time
,
what
a
frightful
future
must
inevitably
lie
before
me
,
”
she
continued
,
speaking
slowly
and
in
hesitating
accents
,
while
she
gazed
into
the
vague
,
over
the
glittering
expanse
of
the
great
lake
.
—
“
I
felt
,
and
for
the
first
time
dreaded
,
the
gloom
which
must
for
ever
envelop
us
—
I
and
he
.
We
shall
travel
through
life
with
this
malign
and
supernatural
companion
;
and
what
repose
,
what
security
,
what
possibility
of
spontaneous
and
fearless
gladness
can
there
be
in
such
a
life
?
For
I
shall
be
for
ever
face
to
face
with
the
probability
of
a
dark
and
swift
catastrophe
.
”
“
Catastrophe
?
”
I
said
.
“
Assuredly
,
”
Miss
Perry
answered
.
“
My
nerves
are
not
of
ircn
,
though
I
am
strong
.
Eventually
they
will
give
under
the
strain
put
upon
them
.
Even
the
most
reasonable
mind
must
be
affected
by
constant
contact
with
unreason
.
At
last
I
may
—
I
shall
—
be
infected
by
the
terror
which
haunts
my
husband
.
To
me
,
also
,
it
will
take
on
bodily
form
,
and
then
Constantine
will
kill
—
kill
—
either
me
or
himself
.
”
I
was
stricken
by
sudden
compunction
.
After
all
,
one
human
being
is
as
good
as
another
in
a
certain
sense
;
each
life
is
of
supreme
value
to
its
possessor
;
all
have
equal
rights
.
Why
,
in
the
eternal
justice
of
things
,
should
this
pretty
and
clever
girl
be
required
to
pay
the
price
of
her
lover
's
singular
misfortune
?
He
adored
her
,
I
know
;
but
did
that
create
so
tremendous
an
obligation
on
her
side
?
It
might
be
very
fairly
argued
that
he
adored
her
to
please
himself
.
“
Leversedge
is
right
.
You
must
not
marry
him
,
”
I
cried
,
with
conviction
.
“
Poor
,
dear
fellow
,
it
is
tragic
for
him
,
horribly
tragic
;
but
you
are
in
no
degree
responsible
for
that
.
You
must
not
marry
him
;
the
risk
is
too
great
.
You
must
cancel
your
engagement
.
”
“
No
,
no
,
”
she
answered
.
“
I
must
not
cancel
my
engagement
.
It
must
stand
.
I
must
marry
him
—
and
at
once
.
”
In
the
excitement
of
the
conversation
we
had
both
risen
to
our
feet
.
We
stood
near
each
other
,
and
for
a
perceptible
space
of
time
looked
full
at
each
other
.
The
girl
's
cheeks
were
flushed
;
her
eyes
were
swimming
in
tears
,
yet
they
danced
.
Charlotte
Perry
was
brilliant
just
then
,
—
the
wind
ruffling
her
abundant
hair
,
while
her
hands
plucked
almost
fiercely
at
the
drooping
buttercups
in
her
belt
.
“
Are
you
afraid
of
your
handiwork
,
”
she
asked
me
;
“
afraid
of
it
at
last
?
”
“
My
handiwork
?
—
I
am
very
honestly
afraid
of
your
happiness
being
wrecked
.
”
“
Ah
!
that
is
wrecked
already
,
”
she
answered
softly
.
“
Now
I
am
only
trying
to
save
what
poor
remnant
is
possible
of
saving
from
the
wreck
.
—
I
do
not
reproach
you
,
though
it
is
your
doing
.
No
—
do
n't
protest
;
you
told
me
you
would
listen
.
Keep
your
promise
,
that
is
only
just
.
Listen
—
I
perceive
only
one
way
to
gain
your
respect
,
perhaps
your
admiration
.
It
is
a
bitter
way
—
flesh
and
blood
can
hardly
endure
it
—
yet
I
take
it
.
Constantine
is
your
friend
,
not
I
.
I
am
interesting
to
you
,
have
been
so
from
the
first
,
merely
on
account
of
the
relation
in
which
I
stand
to
him
.
”
Miss
Perry
lowered
her
eyes
;
she
picked
the
buttercups
to
pieces
one
by
one
,
scattering
their
green
stems
and
shining
yellow
petals
upon
the
grey-drab
planks
of
the
deck
.
“
You
think
lightly
of
me
—
do
not
deny
it
.
I
know
I
speak
the
truth
.
You
criticise
me
at
every
turn
;
you
consider
my
breeding
doubtful
,
my
taste
doubtful
.
You
question
my
sincerity
.
You
cheapen
my
talents
—
in
your
own
mind
—
I
do
not
say
you
do
all
this
openly
,
you
are
too
gentleman-like
to
fall
into
that
error
.
But
being
idle
,
you
amuse
your
leisure
by
casting
me
up
and
dividing
me
out
.
For
Constantine
you
really
care
,
so
you
do
not
sacrifice
him
to
your
rage
for
analysis
;
I
understand
that
.
—
No
—
do
not
interrupt
me
.
I
must
say
it
all
,
all
this
once
.
You
think
me
worldly
,
scheming
,
a
mere
actress
.
By
marrying
Constantine
,
by
yielding
myself
up
unreservedly
to
the
horror
which
encircles
him
,
I
can
vindicate
myself
;
I
can
prove
to
you
that
you
have
misjudged
me
,
and
that
I
am
very
far
from
being
the
cheap
,
artificial
,
half-hearted
adventuress
you
have
supposed
me
to
be
.
”
CHAPTER
III
ONE
does
not
,
unfortunately
,
arrive
at
my
time
of
life
without
having
been
in
some
tight
places
;
but
no
place
,
I
solemnly
declare
,
that
I
have
ever
been
in
quite
equalled
this
one
for
tightness
.
It
pinched
me
most
exceedingly
shrewdly
.
For
all
that
which
Miss
Perry
had
said
was
true
—
true
,
every
word
of
it
!
—
And
we
had
passed
the
stage
of
acquaintance
when
one
can
successfully
take
refuge
in
denial
.
Not
even
lying
of
the
most
barefaced
and
unblushing
character
would
extricate
me
from
the
very
ungraceful
predicament
in
which
my
companion
's
frankness
had
placed
me
.
I
do
not
often
lose
my
temper
;
but
now
a
certain
exasperation
seized
on
me
.
For
was
it
not
really
a
little
too
bad
that
this
charming
person
should
thus
lock
the
door
on
me
and
set
her
back
against
it
?
It
is
disgusting
to
me
to
be
compelled
to
handle
a
woman
other
than
courteously
.
Yet
,
unless
I
exercised
something
of
brutal
masculine
force
in
removing
her
,
how
on
earth
was
I
to
get
the
door
open
and
make
good
my
escape
?
“
My
dear
young
lady
,
—
my
dear
young
lady
,
you
cover
me
with
shame
and
confusion
!
”
I
cried
.
“
You
appear
to
do
me
the
unhappy
compliment
of
attaching
an
importance
to
my
possible
,
or
rather
impossible
,
opinion
—
for
the
opinion
with
which
you
accredit
me
is
positively
preposterous
—
quite
deliriously
above
its
value
.
”
The
girl
pressed
her
hands
to
the
sides
of
her
head
again
.
“
I
am
so
tired
,
”
she
said
.
“
It
is
all
finished
,
as
I
told
you
.
I
have
burnt
my
ships
,
I
have
accepted
my
lot
.
Why
then
try
to
juggle
with
me
?
Why
,
above
all
,
why
be
ungenerous
and
beg
the
question
?
”
“
Good
heavens
!
”
I
exclaimed
,
“
it
is
not
I
who
beg
the
question
.
It
is
you
,
dear
Miss
Perry
,
who
beg
it
,
while
I
am
trying
to
introduce
a
trifle
of
common
sense
into
the
consideration
of
it
.
”
She
turned
away
,
letting
her
arms
drop
at
her
sides
,
and
stared
over
the
bows
of
the
lake-boat
,
now
heading
in
towards
the
row
of
great
Lombardy
poplars
which
line
the
gay
little
quay
and
marketplace
of
Montreux
.
“
I
implore
you
,
in
the
name
of
reason
,
to
leave
all
thought
of
me
out
of
the
business
.
”
For
an
instant
Miss
Perry
looked
at
me
.
“
But
how
can
I
?
”
—
I
cannot
actually
assert
that
I
heard
those
words
,
but
her
quivering
lips
appeared
to
form
them
.
“
Granting
,
for
the
sake
of
argument
,
even
,
”
I
went
on
,
“
that
I
have
been
idiot
enough
to
think
,
in
any
degree
,
any
one
of
the
stupidities
of
which
you
accuse
me
,
what
does
that
signify
as
against
the
very
real
and
serious
matter
of
your
marriage
?
You
are
—
pardon
my
saying
so
—
straining
at
a
gnat
and
swallowing
a
camel
with
a
vengeance
.
Bear
with
me
if
I
speak
plainly
.
—
Marry
Constantine
Leversedge
because
he
loves
you
,
if
you
wish
to
do
an
heroic
act
of
kindness
.
Still
better
,
marry
him
because
you
love
him
,
and
pity
carries
the
day
over
fear
.
”
“
Ah
!
how
little
you
understand
,
”
murmured
Miss
Perry
.
Really
,
I
believe
at
times
I
have
the
right
to
congratulate
myself
on
possessing
miraculous
strength
of
character
.
Or
is
it
only
the
strength
of
alarm
,
not
of
character
—
the
daring
of
the
proverbial
turning-worm
,
the
valour
of
the
proverbial
mouse
in
a
corner
?
I
ca
n't
decide
.
Anyhow
,
I
finished
my
address
.
“
But
to
marry
him
as
proof
to
me
that
you
are
not
the
kind
of
person
you
imagine
I
imagine
you
possibly
may
be
,
is
absurd
and
grotesque
,
an
unspeakable
and
impossible
folly
.
You
cannot
be
guilty
of
it
.
I
refuse
to
permit
you
to
be
guilty
of
it
.
”
“
And
how
will
you
prevent
my
being
guilty
of
it
?
”
the
fair
Charlotte
asked
,
with
rather
astonishing
composure
.
The
flower-like
,
the
dewy
,
the
early
,
early
morning
and
exquisitely
virginal
effect
seemed
suddenly
to
have
passed
away
from
Miss
Perry
.
The
change
in
her
was
unseizable
—
to
roughly
translate
an
untranslatable
Gallicism
—
but
I
was
keenly
aware
of
its
presence
.
“
Tell
my
poor
dear
parents
what
you
have
just
told
me
.
At
first
they
will
neither
believe
nor
understand
you
.
You
will
involve
yourself
in
a
series
of
silly
wordy
scenes
,
which
will
make
our
party
the
comedy
of
the
whole
hotel
.
Tell
Constantine
—
that
will
be
very
simple
—
he
will
destroy
himself
.
”
She
paused
.
“
And
,
meanwhile
,
you
will
have
the
inward
satisfaction
of
continuing
to
think
of
me
just
what
you
have
always
thought
.
I
do
not
propose
to
give
you
that
satisfaction
.
”
“
Are
you
not
slightly
vindictive
?
”
I
inquired
.
“
It
was
not
nice
of
me
.
It
was
a
lapse
of
good
manners
.
But
,
upon
my
honour
,
I
could
not
help
it
.
”
Miss
Perry
put
one
hand
over
her
eyes
,
and
threw
back
her
head
.
Her
throat
was
round
,
firm
,
the
colour
of
it
a
warm
,
delicate
brown
—
delicious
in
the
sunshine
,
which
—
for
I
am
afraid
I
was
shamefully
neglecting
my
office
of
umbrella
bearer
—
enveloped
her
graceful
figure
from
head
to
heel
.
“
You
are
certainly
ungenerous
,
”
she
retorted
.
“
But
all
men
are
that
,
I
believe
,
if
an
unhappy
woman
so
far
forgets
conventionality
as
to
obey
the
dictates
of
—
No
,
pass
that
by
.
Forget
what
I
was
nearly
betrayed
into
saying
.
I
should
be
thankful
to
forget
it
myself
.
Let
us
reason
together
coldly
and
sensibly
,
since
that
is
your
pleasure
;
and
I
will
show
you
why
you
cannot
and
must
not
seek
to
alter
my
resolution
.
”
Again
Charlotte
Perry
's
bright
eyes
filled
,
again
she
spoke
in
modest
,
hesitating
accents
.
“
You
know
how
hard
society
is
,
how
basely
commonplace
in
its
judgments
,
how
blind
to
high
purposes
,
how
sceptical
of
pure
and
elevated
motives
.
You
know
how
it
hates
to
have
its
imagination
taxed
by
action
that
is
touched
by
ideality
.
You
are
a
poet
,
you
must
have
suffered
from
all
this
at
times
,
and
so
you
must
have
seen
how
,
if
a
woman
—
it
is
very
painful
to
me
to
speak
on
this
subject
—
if
a
woman
leaves
her
home
because
the
demands
made
upon
her
are
degrading
,
or
because
her
husband
is
wicked
,
or
because
,
like
the
heroine
of
Ibsen
's
wonderful
drama
,
she
revolts
against
the
narrow
conditions
and
paltry
occupations
of
domestic
life
,
society
looks
doubtfully
upon
her
,
other
women
flout
her
and
draw
aside
their
skirts
.
Even
should
she
give
herself
to
philanthropy
or
enter
a
religious
house
,
she
is
still
suspect
.
But
if
she
leaves
her
home
because
she
pleases
some
other
man
,
society
looks
not
so
very
hardly
on
her
fault
;
often
,
in
a
little
while
,
quite
condones
it
.
In
the
eyes
of
the
great
,
coarse
,
everyday
world
we
are
your
slaves
yet
.
Success
with
a
man
,
that
a
man
should
desire
us
,
in
a
measure
justifies
even
the
most
scandalous
conduct
.
”
Pausing
in
the
midst
of
this
surprising
essay
upon
contemporary
morals
,
Miss
Perry
stooped
and
picked
up
her
hat
.
She
straightened
herself
up
again
,
and
languidly
drew
the
long
pins
out
of
the
crown
of
it
.
Where
was
she
coming
to
?
I
felt
very
nervous
.
The
door
of
escape
was
by
no
means
open
yet
.
“
It
is
very
much
the
same
with
a
girl
's
engagement
,
”
she
went
on
.
“
If
she
cancels
it
because
she
discovers
that
she
and
the
man
whom
she
has
promised
to
marry
are
not
calculated
to
realise
what
marriage
might
be
—
has
sometimes
been
—
in
all
its
exquisite
completeness
,
in
its
profound
though
hidden
poetry
;
if
she
dreads
to
do
violence
to
her
own
ideal
of
love
,
she
is
accused
of
cruelty
and
caprice
.
Women
treat
her
with
a
mixture
of
pity
and
contempt
.
Men
are
familiar
or
surly
with
her
.
She
is
a
failure
,
and
society
has
no
mercy
for
failure
.
But
if
she
breaks
it
off
because
someone
else
cares
for
her
,
in
obedience
to
his
will
,
she
is
justified
in
the
opinion
of
the
world
,
of
her
friends
,
of
her
parents
—
in
that
even
of
her
rejected
admirer
.
”
When
Charlotte
raised
her
eyes
to
mine
again
they
were
as
stars
of
morning
.
No
wonder
poor
Leversedge
worshipped
her
if
,
at
times
,
she
looked
at
him
thus
!
She
was
,
indeed
,
of
a
quality
to
turn
the
steadiest
head
!
At
this
moment
,
in
the
wind
and
sunshine
,
the
blue
lake
behind
her
,
the
pale
deck
before
,
the
gay
little
Swiss
town
—
its
quaintly
carved
gables
and
balconies
,
its
rows
of
emerald-green
shutters
and
bright
awnings
,
its
line
of
magnificent
,
quivering
,
whispering
poplars
,
—
sliding
by
on
our
right
as
the
steamer
slowed
up
at
the
pier
,
Charlotte
Perry
had
her
moment
of
triumph
,
she
was
absolutely
and
distractingly
lovely
.
“
She
is
a
success
.
Society
smiles
on
her
,
fêtes
and
applauds
her
.
For
has
she
not
upon
her
the
hall-mark
which
all
will
acknowledge
?
It
is
well
to
be
loved
by
one
man
.
It
is
just
doubly
well
to
be
loved
by
two
.
And
—
”
The
girl
stretched
out
her
hands
.
Thank
heaven
there
was
a
movement
on
board
,
passengers
acquiring
hand-bags
,
umbrellas
,
impedimenta
in
general
,
prior
to
disembarking
,
so
nobody
,
I
believed
,
—
with
relief
,
I
believe
so
still
,
—
specially
noticed
our
proceedings
.
“
And
she
is
very
,
very
grateful
,
Mr.
Hammond
.
Her
happiness
is
secured
.
It
is
completed
instead
of
being
wrecked
.
”
These
are
things
to
turn
one
's
hair
grey
,
even
contemplating
them
after
a
lapse
of
years
.
Let
me
take
breath
!
So
very
much
comes
into
this
question
of
marriage
that
one
's
brain
fairly
reels
under
it
.
For
a
woman
it
is
probably
,
as
Perry
père
remarked
,
“
an
arduous
undertaking
”
;
but
for
one
of
us
,
oh
my
brothers
,
it
is
—
well
,
what
is
it
not
?
Personally
,
I
am
unfitted
for
a
primitive
state
of
society
,
I
know
that
.
Were
you
to
take
off
my
clothes
and
send
me
up
a
tree
to
pick
nuts
,
I
should
go
very
hungry
myself
;
while
those
dependent
upon
me
would
almost
certainly
starve
.
Yet
I
look
back
,
not
without
yearning
,
to
the
epoch
of
primal
innocence
,
when
man
and
woman
mated
gaily
,
parted
gaily
,
even
as
those
most
delectable
of
living
creatures
,
the
birds
,
do
.
For
the
bond
of
wedlock
,
as
understood
for
many
hundred
years
now
by
the
more
civilised
nations
—
specially
those
of
the
Anglo-Saxon
race
—
adds
a
terror
to
life
.
To
pass
two
or
three
days
in
the
Divorce
Court
would
be
about
as
much
to
my
taste
as
passing
them
in
the
Old
Fleet
Ditch
;
yet
how
can
a
man
of
average
sensibility
be
expected
,
at
a
given
moment
,
to
know
and
make
up
his
mind
finally
and
irrevocably
in
respect
of
womanhood
and
the
affections
?
Aphrodite
is
a
mighty
and
marvellous
goddess
.
Who
that
has
once
,
in
ever
so
small
a
degree
,
beheld
her
glory
,
shall
dare
worship
her
under
a
single
aspect
only
,
or
in
a
single
place
?
Of
course
there
is
the
ancient
theory
—
does
it
not
at
least
date
from
the
days
of
Aristophanes
?
—
of
the
One
Man
—
the
One
Woman
;
and
I
have
laboured
valiantly
to
cherish
it
,
since
it
appeared
to
offer
a
practical
solution
to
my
moral
and
emotional
difficulties
.
Like
the
hero
of
a
certain
evil
and
exquisite
romance
,
the
title
of
which
I
refrain
from
mentioning
,
I
set
out
early
in
quest
of
the
One
Woman
who
should
satisfy
all
my
aspirations
,
all
my
tastes
,
all
—
if
you
will
have
it
—
my
latent
masculine
sensuality
;
who
should
dominate
me
at
first
sight
,
who
should
hold
me
then
and
ever
after
.
I
have
sought
her
diligently
,
and
—
I
admit
it
reluctantly
,
for
it
must
sound
most
impertinently
fastidious
—
I
am
seeking
her
yet
.
This
quest
,
indeed
,
has
become
a
fixed
idea
with
me
.
It
presents
itself
,
as
a
matter
of
course
,
at
sight
of
each
new
and
charming
face
—
and
the
number
of
new
and
charming
faces
which
offer
themselves
for
inspection
is
really
delightfully
great
.
It
presents
itself
even
in
respect
of
faces
already
fairly
well
known
to
me
,
under
circumstances
of
a
peculiar
or
provocative
character
.
It
presented
itself
very
distinctly
to
me
now
,
on
the
sunny
deck
of
the
lake-boat
,
as
Miss
Perry
's
soft
voice
faltered
,
and
she
stretched
out
her
hands
in
that
most
moving
action
of
appeal
.
She
was
so
varied
,
so
captivating
,
so
uncommonly
clever
,
at
times
so
deliciously
pretty
;
her
prospects
were
of
so
dubiously
hopeful
and
encouraging
a
sort
.
And
then
,
had
she
by
chance
spoken
the
truth
,
not
only
in
respect
of
my
reading
,
but
of
my
misreading
,
of
her
?
Might
not
,
by
chance
,
her
picture
of
herself
be
a
more
faithful
one
than
that
which
I
—
with
my
wretched
little
habit
of
being
too
sharp
by
half
in
the
ungracious
business
of
picking
my
neighbours
to
pieces
—
had
drawn
of
her
?
Surely
it
was
very
generous
,
after
all
my
silent
detraction
and
,
at
moments
,
my
outspoken
disagreement
,
thus
to
give
me
another
chance
!
And
then
the
coercive
,
the
well-nigh
irresistible
,
flattery
of
thus
finding
oneself
the
object
of
a
young
and
lovely
person
's
affection
!
Is
there
anything
on
earth
quite
so
agreeable
?
—
(
For
a
little
while
,
at
all
events
.
After
the
first
blush
of
the
affair
one
usually
becomes
inconveniently
sensible
of
make-weights
and
conceivable
complications
)
—
No
!
I
protest
there
is
not
.
And
so
it
came
about
that
,
for
the
space
of
at
least
twenty
seconds
,
I
asked
myself
quite
seriously
whether
it
was
not
possible
that
here
,
here
in
the
daughter
of
Perry
père
et
mère
,
of
the
lively
rat
and
excellent
clock-moon
,
improbable
as
it
might
appear
at
first
sight
,
I
had
found
that
which
I
had
sought
so
long
and
vainly
—
the
complement
of
my
nature
,
the
comprehensively
and
perpetually
seductive
being
,
the
,
for
me
,
One
Woman
?
Those
twenty
seconds
were
immensely
pleasant
,
I
would
willingly
have
extended
them
indefinitely
.
But
,
alas
!
for
that
at
once
so
consolatory
and
so
detestable
doctrine
—
the
Doctrine
of
Perpetual
Flux
—
twenty
seconds
were
the
limit
;
and
then
the
delectable
equilibrium
in
which
my
mind
had
hung
was
rudely
disturbed
.
It
went
on
working
—
I
mean
that
eternal
see-saw
,
which
I
call
my
mind
,
did
.
It
suffered
a
barbarian
invasion
of
rough
doubts
,
tumultuous
questions
,
inartistic
moralities
,
which
beat
upon
it
as
with
heavy
clubs
.
For
,
after
all
,
when
I
came
to
consider
it
,
no
miraculous
change
had
passed
over
Charlotte
Perry
,
or
her
parents
,
or
my
friend
Leversedge
,
or
myself
,
or
our
mutual
relations
,
or
our
prospects
,
or
our
antecedents
,
or
our
surroundings
.
All
these
stood
precisely
where
they
had
stood
.
That
which
we
had
been
,
both
in
regard
of
ourselves
and
each
other
,
that
we
still
essentially
and
indubitably
were
.
There
was
no
squaring
the
circle
.
It
was
all
,
not
otherwise
,
but
just
exactly
so
.
For
how
was
I
,
who
had
never
yet
given
myself
away
,
of
all
men
to
give
myself
away
thus
recklessly
?
Bless
my
soul
,
contemplate
the
inevitable
consequences
!
How
was
I
,
who
had
always
plumed
myself
on
maintaining
a
nice
standard
of
taste
in
friendship
,
of
all
men
to
steal
his
fiancée
,
and
play
the
part
of
a
Bowdlerised
King
David
to
the
Uriah
of
poor
dear
Leversedge
?
No
,
no
;
it
was
really
a
trifle
tiresome
,
but
,
in
truth
,
I
had
neither
moral
courage
nor
was
I
scoundrel
enough
for
all
this
.
And
then
,
with
a
blush
of
shame
I
remember
it
,
for
it
reflects
small
credit
on
either
my
head
or
heart
,
one
of
those
trivial
incidents
occurred
which
so
completely
and
immediately
quench
the
fires
of
my
not
perhaps
very
strikingly
volcanic
nature
.
Miss
Perry
,
I
apprehend
,
had
found
these
twenty
seconds
longer
than
I
did
.
She
became
restless
;
she
grew
—
it
was
very
excusable
—
somewhat
impatient
of
my
silence
.
The
grey
deck
planks
,
where
the
hem
of
her
brown
holland
skirt
touched
them
,
were
strewn
with
the
remnants
of
her
bouquet
of
buttercups
.
She
put
out
her
right
foot
,
and
in
a
nervous
,
and
—
I
am
compelled
to
add
—
somewhat
awkward
,
manner
pushed
the
green
stems
aside
and
crushed
the
shining
petals
.
Those
women
who
are
possessed
of
well-shaped
feet
,
kindly
permit
one
,
in
the
present
day
,
to
be
fully
aware
of
that
agreeable
fact
;
and
it
occurred
to
me
that
,
considering
her
pretensions
to
fashion
,
the
opportunities
afforded
me
of
beholding
the
fair
Charlotte
's
feet
had
been
distinctly
limited
.
Now
I
understood
why
.
Whether
Nature
or
her
bootmaker
was
in
fault
,
I
cannot
,
of
course
,
pretend
to
determine
.
I
charitably
trust
the
former
.
For
with
Nature
clearly
there
is
no
arguing
;
whereas
any
human
being
,
possessed
of
the
powers
of
speech
and
volition
,
can
remonstrate
with
and
,
in
extreme
cases
,
change
their
bootmaker
.
Miss
Perry
's
boots
or
shoes
—
I
think
they
were
shoes
—
were
wide
,
easy
,
trodden
over
,
their
square
toes
turned
badly
heavenward
.
I
could
write
a
pamphlet
on
the
subject
of
boots
—
they
are
an
awful
revelation
of
personal
character
.
Vulgarities
otherwise
skilfully
concealed
come
out
in
the
shape
of
a
heel
;
sloth
leaves
indelible
tracks
across
upper
leathers
.
In
moments
of
illumination
I
have
detected
gluttony
in
a
lace
and
profligacy
in
a
button
.
The
Carissima
's
shoes
did
not
betray
the
presence
of
any
mortal
sin
,
let
me
hasten
to
add
.
But
since
,
judging
by
the
rest
of
her
costume
,
I
could
be
in
no
doubt
as
to
the
sufficiency
of
her
purse
,
they
disclosed
a
vein
of
indolence
,
of
insufficient
pride
,
of
lack
of
perception
;
they
were
the
shoes
of
one
whose
promise
is
better
than
her
performance
,
of
one
capable
of
alarming
lapses
—
briefly
,
they
did
n't
do
.
And
in
the
theory
of
the
One
Woman
it
is
imperatively
necessary
that
the
whole
should
please
in
detail
,
as
well
as
in
its
completeness
.
And
—
what
a
relief
(
yes
!
I
had
reached
that
stage
already
!
)
to
be
able
to
pack
the
manifold
pros
and
cons
into
the
compass
of
a
syllogism
—
here
was
a
detail
which
radically
displeased
,
therefore
Miss
Perry
was
not
the
One
Woman
.
It
was
undoubtedly
soothing
to
have
the
matter
thus
definitely
settled
;
but
it
was
anything
but
a
graceful
pastime
to
convey
the
assurance
of
that
settlement
to
my
companion
.
Is
it
conceivable
that
women
really
enjoy
refusing
their
admirers
?
If
so
,
they
are
amazingly
strong-minded
,
judging
by
my
own
—
but
I
abstain
from
further
comment
.
Suffice
it
to
say
,
I
am
conscious
that
a
certain
ardour
which
must
have
been
perceptible
in
my
attitude
and
manner
—
though
I
am
not
endowed
with
a
superfluity
of
what
is
technically
known
as
“
facial
expression
”
—
flickered
and
died
.
And
Miss
Perry
—
I
was
unspeakably
ashamed
,
yet
how
,
oh
!
how
I
blessed
her
—
must
have
been
aware
of
that
waning
of
a
fine
flame
.
“
Please
give
me
my
parasol
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
”
she
said
,
suddenly
,
hastily
.
“
The
sun
is
very
hot
.
”
She
sat
down
,
drooped
down
,
upon
the
camp
stool
again
.
I
was
horribly
afraid
she
was
crying
,
as
I
handed
her
her
umbrella
—
but
I
am
not
sure
.
I
avoided
looking
at
her
.
I
really
had
not
the
face
to
do
so
,
for
I
knew
I
must
appear
utterly
despicable
to
her
.
I
appeared
so
to
myself
.
In
spirit
I
poured
forth
volumes
of
scathing
invectives
against
myself
,
vials
of
contemptuous
wrath
upon
my
own
devoted
head
.
I
found
it
in
my
heart
to
wish
the
lake-boat
might
incontinently
strike
upon
a
rock
and
founder
,
and
that
I
might
magnanimously
sacrifice
my
life
—
I
am
a
singularly
poor
swimmer
—
in
saving
that
of
Miss
Perry
.
This
was
a
cheap
wish
,
since
I
was
aware
the
Lake
of
Geneva
is
deep
beyond
all
possibility
of
shipwreck
from
the
above
cause
.
During
these
twenty
seconds
—
and
more
,
for
the
silence
lasted
—
I
certainly
paid
a
heavy
price
for
those
other
twenty
seconds
of
delightful
mental
equilibrium
.
To
speak
was
of
necessity
to
apologise
;
and
to
apologise
was
little
short
of
an
insult
.
I
might
have
gone
away
;
but
to
go
away
seemed
to
me
a
course
of
action
at
once
uncourteous
and
inconclusive
.
So
,
in
rich
discomfort
,
I
waited
.
The
bell
had
rung
,
we
were
steaming
westward
once
more
,
while
Montreux
and
its
poplars
receded
in
the
distance
.
“
The
civil
marriage
will
take
place
on
Thursday
,
at
Geneva
,
”
Charlotte
Perry
said
,
at
last
.
“
Constantine
has
gone
there
to-day
to
see
the
Consul
and
make
all
necessary
arrangements
.
He
has
been
resident
in
the
district
for
a
sufficient
length
of
time
,
there
will
be
no
difficulty
or
—
or
delay
.
The
religious
ceremony
will
take
place
here
on
Friday
.
”
The
girl
looked
up
.
Our
eyes
met
.
“
You
will
be
present
?
”
she
added
softly
.
“
Unfortunately
I
cannot
be
,
”
I
replied
.
“
I
leave
by
the
mail
to-night
.
I
shall
be
in
Paris
,
on
my
way
to
England
.
”
“
No
,
no
!
”
Miss
Perry
cried
.
She
rose
to
her
feet
and
faced
me
imperiously
.
Her
tearful
mood
had
wholly
vanished
.
She
became
that
which
she
had
been
the
night
before
,
almost
alarming
,
almost
tremendous
,
notwithstanding
her
youth
and
remarkable
good
looks
.
“
You
shall
not
escape
so
easily
,
”
she
said
.
“
I
have
borne
much
from
you
,
but
I
refuse
to
bear
that
.
You
shall
not
slip
away
comfortably
and
amuse
yourself
—
perhaps
with
some
other
friend
—
friend
?
”
—
her
voice
took
a
most
disconcerting
inflection
of
sarcasm
—
“
elsewhere
,
while
you
leave
me
to
lift
the
great
burden
which
you
—
yes
,
you
—
have
helped
to
force
upon
me
,
unaided
and
alone
.
I
have
a
claim
on
you
—
we
need
not
discuss
the
exact
nature
of
it
,
since
you
,
I
think
,
hardly
dare
deny
its
existence
—
and
I
require
you
to
meet
that
claim
to
the
full
.
This
is
not
revenge
,
this
is
justice
—
bare
justice
.
You
shall
be
witness
of
this
business
to
the
very
end
.
You
shall
see
what
I
do
,
hear
what
I
say
—
I
will
leave
you
no
loophole
for
disbelief
,
for
doubt
.
You
shall
recognise
my
worth
—
you
shall
admire
my
conduct
—
I
will
compel
you
to
admire
it
.
”
Suddenly
Charlotte
Perry
's
eyes
filled
and
her
mouth
gathered
into
that
really
delicious
suggestion
of
a
kiss
.
I
was
carried
away
in
spite
of
myself
.
“
I
admire
you
already
,
”
I
exclaimed
.
“
You
are
extraordinary
,
you
are
enchanting
.
”
Again
,
for
a
moment
,
the
girl
's
appearance
grew
absolutely
dazzling
.
“
Ah
!
”
she
cried
,
“
I
have
wrung
that
out
of
you
at
last
—
no
,
pray
say
no
more
.
Do
not
spoil
your
admission
either
by
exaggeration
or
by
explanation
.
Leave
it
as
it
stands
.
Submit
to
be
spontaneous
for
once
!
”
—
Her
tone
changed
,
became
pensive
,
modest
,
full
of
hesitation
.
“
You
will
remain
,
Mr.
Hammond
,
and
take
part
in
the
—
the
sad
—
for
some
of
us
it
must
be
sad
—
ceremony
of
Friday
.
Constantine
will
ask
you
to
be
his
best
man
,
and
you
will
accept
.
Meanwhile
you
will
help
me
—
I
think
you
will
?
This
is
Tuesday
,
so
after
all
the
time
is
short
—
you
will
help
me
to
prevent
my
poor
dear
parents
arriving
at
any
premature
knowledge
of
the
truth
.
They
must
think
that
I
—
am
happy
—
that
—
that
I
am
glad
.
And
I
fear
they
are
growing
suspicious
.
To-day
Mamma
—
but
I
will
not
trouble
you
with
all
that
.
You
must
help
me
lull
their
fears
to
rest
.
”
Miss
Perry
raised
her
hand
,
laid
it
upon
her
eyes
.
“
I
am
very
tired
,
”
she
said
.
“
We
have
talked
enough
.
”
She
turned
her
back
upon
me
,
so
disposing
her
yellow
and
black
parasol
that
it
offered
an
insuperable
barrier
to
further
conversation
.
And
I
strolled
away
to
the
stern
of
the
boat
,
there
lighting
upon
Perry
père
and
the
Deputy
Surgeon-General
in
full
session
,
discussing
the
enormities
of
the
Opium
Traffic
and
the
still
greater
ones
of
our
venerable
,
late
Radical
premier
.
While
listening
to
their
artless
,
though
wordy
conversation
,
I
bowed
low
before
the
genius
of
Charlotte
Perry
.
I
could
not
fathom
her
,
she
was
beyond
me
;
consequently
—
for
masculine
vanity
recoils
instinctively
from
the
feminine
creature
it
has
not
the
wit
to
fathom
—
she
was
not
,
and
never
could
be
for
me
,
the
One
Woman
.
Yet
she
was
,
I
owned
it
,
a
woman
of
ten
thousand
,
for
she
could
play
a
losing
game
,
she
could
show
herself
great
in
the
hour
of
defeat
.
CHAPTER
IV
IT
is
really
rather
annoying
to
find
how
,
having
once
,
though
for
the
most
perfectly
legitimate
object
,
started
a
disturbing
line
of
thought
,
that
line
of
thought
refuses
to
quit
you
,
finds
perpetual
occasion
for
reproducing
itself
;
hunts
you
,
in
short
,
as
though
it
